Whether you want to get someone to like you as a friend or as a potential love interest, there are many things that you can do to make that happen. You do have to be willing to make an effort if you want to get a certain person to like you.
If you want to find out how to make someone like you, you can read some of the tips below and learn where to start.
Show interest
The most obvious way to make someone like you is by showing that you have an interest in them. If you do not pay any attention to this person at all, then why should they pay any attention to you?
When you show some interest in someone, then you will open the door for a possible friendship or a romantic relationship, and you should make it clear what kind of relationship you want.
If you want to grow a relationship with someone, then you have to plant the seed of interest first. From there, a meaningful relationship can begin to grow.
There are many ways to show your interest in another person. To start off with, you can say hi to that person when you see them and goodbye when you leave. This is just the bare minimum and is something you can do with everyone that you are around.
After you have established some sort of groundwork, ask that person how they are doing or how their weekend was. This shows that you have an interest in getting to know that person and what they do in their life.
To even further show your interest in this person, get to know what their likes and dislikes are. What are their interests? What did they bring to work for lunch? How are their kids doing? Find ways to ask them about the little things about their life.
Demonstrate your knowledge of these things when you have conversations and this person will know that you have been making the effort to get to know them. If you do these things then it will be clear that you have an interest in this individual.
Make eye contact
Making eye contact with someone while you are talking to them will help you to form a better connection to that person. On the other hand, if you avoid eye contact, then you will seem nervous and as if you have something to hide.
After all, they do say that the windows are the eyes to the soul. Try to make eye contact occasionally and you will seem more personable and relatable.
When making eye contact, try to appear natural and relaxed. You do not want the eye contact to be intimidating. Instead, it should have the effect of making the other person feel at ease and connected to you.
If you do eye maintain contact the right way, then this person will feel like they are important, as if they matter to you. And that kind of feeling can easily make this person like you.
Ask them about themselves
No matter how shy we are, we all like to talk about ourselves to some extent. Whether it is bragging about something that you are especially skilled at or explaining an interest that gets you excited, it can be fun to talk about yourself to other people.
If there is someone out there that you want to like you, then ask them about themselves. Start off with something small like asking about their weekend or plans for the holidays.
For someone that you are more familiar with, you can ask about their interests and favorite things. How do certain things make this person feel?
Asking such questions can bring you and this other person closer together and when they feel closer to you, they will like you.
Compliment them
We all like to feel as if we are special. That is why compliments can work so well. If you give a compliment to someone that you are interested in, they will know that you like them. And maybe they will begin to like you as well.
When it comes to compliments, try to be genuine and avoid compliments that are over-the-top or are just not true. Doing so might make the other person think that you are sweet but not at all genuine.
You are better off sticking closer to the truth when it comes to paying compliments. That way, you will not struggle to do it and it will be coming from the heart.
Think about how you feel when someone compliments things about you such as your outfit or a skill you have. Being complimented probably makes you feel special and it is something that you might remember for the rest of the day, if not for much longer than that.
If you give someone a compliment, it might end up being something that they remember quite fondly. And you will feel great for making that person feel good about themselves.
Smile at them
Smiling at a person can do many things for them. It can make them feel at ease and relaxed. It will demonstrate that you are in good spirits, which in turn can put that person in a good mood as well.
Think about how you might feel when someone smiles at you. You might feel more comfortable around this person and as if they are in good spirits.
A smile is the perfect accessory that you can wear. The feeling that a smile gives can be infectious and it is certainly much more appealing than a scowl or a frown.
The ideal smile is not too long and not too forced. Just flash a quick, friendly smile to make this person feel even more drawn to you. When you smile at someone, it will be hard for them to resist liking you.
Be a little mysterious
When you are still getting to know someone new, it is great to share information about yourself with them. After all it is how they will get to know you.
At the same time, you do not have to reveal every little detail about yourself just yet. For one thing, doing so could easily become overwhelming for the other person.
Be careful that you do not inundate this person with too much information about yourself, especially information that is deeply personal. We can only comfortably process so much new information at once.
Also, if you leave some air of mystery to you, then you could leave the other person wanting to know more about you. This will give you a chance to have plenty more conversations down the line since you are not spilling every little bit of information about yourself.
Be available
Make an effort to spend some time with the person that you are interested in. This can include hanging out with them in person as well as communicating with them by texting or calling them.
Let them know that they can talk to you and that they have your attention. It should be clear that you are happy to spend time with this person.
But not too available
At the same time, do not appear to be way too eager to be around this person. That can seem desperate and it could be overwhelming for the person.
Signs of being too available include trying to hog that person all to yourself, especially when there are other people around. And avoid bombarding this person with text messages and phone calls or rushing to respond every single time.
Whether you are pursuing a friendship or a relationship, a little space is healthy for any relationship. Allow some breathing so this person will not feel smothered by your presence. When you are absent even for a little bit, they will have more of a chance to miss you.
Do not try too hard
It is great to be courteous and generous especially to people that we like, but do not do it so much that you seem desperate.
Trying way too hard will come off as needy and it can be too much for most people. So do make an effort, but know when to stop.
On top of being around too much, calling too much, and texting too much, you will want to avoid being over the top in what you give this person.
There is something to be said about “playing it cool.” Do not be aloof, but do not act desperate for this person’s companionship or approval either.
For the most part, you should try to maintain a cool composure. Be enthusiastic and happy with this person while exercising restraint at the same time.
Be honest
As we all know, honesty is the best policy. It is a strong foundation of any relationship between two people. Without honesty, how can you trust someone?
You might be tempted to impress this person and that is perfectly normal. But instead of lying or embellishing the truth, why no impress them with the stuff about you that is actually true?
If you lie, especially if it is often, then you might get caught in a lie and then this person might not know how to trust you again.
At the same time, you do not have to mistake honesty for being completely transparent. You do not need to tell this person every single detail about you, especially if you are not ready.
Be positive
While we all have our bad days, positivity is an attractive quality to have. When you give off positive energy, you attract positive energy as well.
But if you are negative, then people will feel negative around you because of the energy that you are giving off.
Part of being positive includes not complaining about every little thing. This includes having to wait a few extra minutes to be seated at a restaurant.
Do not try to see the faults in everyone. If you complain about other people too often, then the person that you want to like you will wonder if you complain about them when they are not there as well.
When you have a positive attitude, then people will remember you for being nice and optimistic. They will notice how relaxed they are around you and they might even find that being around you is fun.
Be warm
If you put up a wall between yourself and others, then it will be hard for them to like you or to even get to know you.
Being a warm person includes having relaxed facial expressions and body language. If you are tense, people will be able to sense that right away.
Another aspect of having a warm personality is not passing judgment on people. Even if there are things that you disagree with, you can learn to respect those differences rather than openly judge them. As a result, people will feel comfortable around you.
Also, try to focus your attention on the other person if you want them to feel like you are a warm person. Only talking about yourself will come off as conceited. Show that you care about that person and that you want to know what they are thinking.
Show an interest in this person’s life and they will note you for the warmth that you display towards them. When you try to get to really know a person, they will open up to you and inevitably end up liking you as a person.
Find out your shared values
Shared values can definitely bring two people very close together. When you think similarly to another person, then they will feel as if you share a certain special connection with them.
First off, be honest about your values. Do not just go and change them because you want this person to like you. If your values do change, it should be because of what you think and not because you want someone else’s approval.
While you might not agree with everything that another person will think, you are bound to have some similar values. So find out what those are and you will have something to bond over and talk about together.
Find your similarities
Common similarities are another big things that can make a person like you. Whether it is traits that you are born with or interests that you have, it is great to share similarities with others.
Sharing similarities with other people is what makes us able to connect with them. If you had nothing at all in common with another person, then you might really struggle to like each other.
It is easy for us to like those who share similarities with us. When you find common ground with someone, then that person will feel like they know you better. It is because you are like them, even if it is just in a few ways.
Tell a secret
When you are vulnerable and trusting, it can make people see you in a whole new light. They might feel closer to you as a result of you sharing a secret with them.
Sharing a secret of yours can open you up to other people. They will realize that you trust them and that you are not perfect.
At the same time, you will want to be careful about what kind of secret you share. There are small secrets such as admitting that you are afraid of bears and there are big secrets that are very serious in nature.
If you do decide to share a big secret with that person, approach things with caution and try to be sure that they can handle that kind of information. When done right, secrets can bring people closer together.
Be trustworthy
Show that you can keep a secret and that you can be trusted. If the person that you want to like you tells you a secret, do not go around sharing it with other people, especially not with people that you both know.
Trust does not just stop with secrets. Let this person also trust that you will be there for them and that you will show up when you plan to do things together.
The idea of trust also has to do with loyalty and being genuine with that person.
Most of the time, trust is not something that can happen overnight. You have to build trust over a period of time and establish that sense of trust with the other person. For this reason, having patience is important.
Be confident
There is no doubt that a good amount of confidence is an attractive quality to have. Little or no confidence is not very appealing and way too much confidence can end up being a major turn-off to people.
How do you show that you are confident to others? First of all, you should know that confidence comes from within. It stems from self-acceptance and knowing what your best strengths and qualities are.
Confidence is about not being afraid to make mistakes or to look foolish. It is about taking risks and putting yourself out there.
Have a sense of humor
Being able to laugh is something that will put most people at ease. This includes being able to laugh at yourself on occasion.
If you take things way too seriously, including yourself, then you can be viewed as tense and rigid. But if you can have a sense of humor then people will feel more at ease with you.
Be friendly with their friends
It is often true that the way to a person’s heart is through their friends. If you can get into the good graces of these friends, then that will definitely be a point in your favor.
If a person’s friends do not like you, especially if it is the best friends, then it will be even harder for that person to like you. Sure, it is possible to get them to like you anyway, but you will face some challenges in the process.
Needless to say, it is good if the friends of this person like you. So you can follow a lot of the tips here to get those friends to like you as well.
Do things that you would do to get any other person to like you. Show an interest in these friends and have a sense of humor.
Embrace something that they are passionate about
When you show an interest in that person’s passions, or at least one of those passions, their eyes will light up with excitement and they will happily share that passion with you.
It is easy to like someone when they are enthusiastic about one of your passions. It gives you more to talk about and you will not struggle for topics in your conversations.
Love yourself
One of the best ways to get someone to like you is if you love yourself. That confidence will show and it can attract other people to you.
While it is normal to be hard on yourself at times or to be very conscious of your flaws, being too hard on yourself might have the effect of repelling people from you. Too much negative energy might scare people away.
Conclusion
Getting someone to like you can be summed up like this: be yourself in the best way possible. Have confidence and love yourself because everyone likes someone who can be comfortable in your own skin.
Also, remember that it is not enough to just care about other people. You have to demonstrate an interest in them and what makes them happy. Show that you care by being present, by being available to this person, and by asking questions about themselves.
Maintaining a positive outlook can greatly increase your chances of being liked by another person as well. People like positivity and are attracted to it. It will make them feel good about themselves and their own lives and they will enjoy being around you if you are pleasant to be around.
When all else has failed, remember that not everyone will like you and that is okay. You are not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. But keep trying and you will see some success from your efforts.
Hey, introverts! So you want to know how to make someone like you over text, eh?
Well, you’ve come to the right place.
I’m going to share with you some of my top tips for crafting the perfect text message that will have them crushing on you in no time.
But before we get started, let’s take a moment to acknowledge the fact that this whole process can feel daunting. I mean, how are we supposed to present ourselves in a way that’s both genuine and appealing through mere words on a screen?
Don’t worry, I promise it’s not as hard as it seems. With these proven tips, you’ll be winning them over in no time.
By the time you finish reading, you will know how to:
- Identify 5 texting habits that indicate someone likes you
- Make your romantic interest smile via text
- Make them chase you so they don’t lose interest
At its core, getting someone to like you over text messages is an extension of the banter lessons we teach at The Art of Charm.
The Key to Effortless Flirting Over Text Messages
Whether you’re texting someone you just met or someone you’ve known for a while, the most important piece of advice is to have fun.
Keep your texts playful and lighthearted. Make someone smile and light up when they see your message and you are on your way to getting them to like you over text.
But how will you know if someone likes you or they’re just playing games?
5 Obvious Texting Habits That Reveal Someone Likes You
There are a lot of ways to tell if someone likes you based on how they text, but here are five of the most common texting habits that give it away.
1) Quick to respond
Short response times are the most obvious texting habit that clue you in on whether or not someone likes you.
If someone is excited to talk to you, the easiest way to tell is how quickly they respond to your messages. If they send a message back within minutes (or even seconds), it’s a good sign that they’re into you.
It’s even better if it turns into a back-and-forth conversation where you’re texting each other in real-time.
2) They ask questions
The next texting habit is whether or not they’re asking you questions.
Attraction stems from the curiosity you feel about someone, so if someone is into you, they will ask questions about you. They want to know more about who you are and what makes you tick.
3) They keep the conversation going
If someone likes you, they will want to keep talking to you.
They might ask another question right after sending you a text. Or after you answer a question they asked, they might answer it themselves without you asking.
Pay attention to how the conversation flows. If it feels like you’re pulling teeth after you start talking, it could mean they’re not into you (or they don’t like texting).
4) Vulnerability
Being vulnerable can be scary.
And it can be scarier over text messages in the early stages because we can’t see facial expressions or body language. We can only read how they want to respond via text message.
But vulnerability is how we connect as humans. So if the other individual opens up and shares personal details about their life, it is a good sign they like you and trust you not to judge them.
5) Good morning and good night texts
If someone texts you, they are thinking about you.
So, if someone is thinking about you in the morning, they are likely starting their day with good thoughts about you.
And if someone texts you good night, it means they’re ending their day thinking about you and how they hope to see you again soon.
How to Make Your Romantic Interest Smile Over Text
“At the end of the day people won’t remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.” ― Maya Angelou
The goal then is to make people feel good whenever they’re texting you so they will associate you with positive feelings. And people want to spend time around people who make them feel good.
You may not be able to see their face, but here are some surefire ways to make your romantic interest smile by text:
Tease them. Don’t be afraid to poke fun at someone you’re texting in a playful, good-natured way. Not only does teasing someone makes them laugh, but it shows that you’re not just a suck-up.
Teasing alone can show that you have confidence, and this will help build attraction.
Here’s an example of a fun text to send someone that reflects this confident, playful teasing:
- “You’re a closet dork, aren’t you… except without the closet!”
- “When we go out on Friday… do you promise not to kidnap me?”
- “If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket left… I’d miss you tons and think of you often”
Make fun of yourself. A surefire way to get someone to smile over text is to make fun of yourself in a tongue-in-cheek kind of way. By making fun of yourself, you get them laughing and show that it’s okay for them to let their guard down. They’ll feel more comfortable with you, which will allow them to become more attracted to you.
Examples:
- “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure”
- “Take my advice—I’m not using it!”
Guess their answers. Another way to have fun and keep your texts interesting is to guess how they might answer. This is a great way to turn boring text into a flirty text, separate yourself from others, and ultimately get them interested in you.
For example, your text could read:
- “What are you up to this weekend? Let me guess… taking a speed knitting class so you can make me a scarf! You are sooo sweet!”
- “How was your vacation? Wait, let me guess… you made friends with a mysterious old man who taught you how to be a master jewel thief!”
Roleplay. The same banter techniques that work in meeting and attracting someone in real life also work great over text. Initiate a scenario in which you’re already a couple in some capacity: a husband and wife headed toward divorce, a rock star and a groupie, a pair of buddy cops on the case—anything else you can think of.
Banter through made-up roleplay is great.
It provides a playful way to create a shared experience that makes the other person smile. The other person also feels more connected to you by sharing what your collaborative imaginations can come up with.
Examples to get roleplay rolling:
- “Green Sparrow, I’ve got the target in my sights! Should I take the shot? Over!”
- “I’m in the lab inventing a new ice cream flavor. What should I bring us home for dessert, dear?”
- “I’m putting together a crew for a bank heist this weekend. What skillset are you bringing to the table?”
- “I’m looking for a superhero sidekick. Tell me about the last time you saved the world from an evil supervillain.”
Make Them Chase You
When seeking romance, we tend to go for the ones who provide us with some kind of challenge—and this goes both ways. Make things too easy for your prospective partner and it will be a turn-off, so give them the chance to chase you.
You can do this by following these two texting tips:
Disqualify yourself. To look more confident and avoid coming across as needy, playfully disqualify yourself from your crush’s dating pool. That is a joke about how the two of you would never be right for each other.
You could, for instance, text something like: “Woah, woah! You like [thing s/he likes]? I didn’t know you were that type! I might have to get my mom’s permission just to kick it with you…”
By playfully pushing away like this, you create the space for them to chase you.
Do not over-text. This is one of the worst texting mistakes as too much texting can destroy attraction. As a general rule, whoever is putting the most effort into communication is the one doing the chasing.
So if you want to be pursued rather than the pursuer, then you must not over-text.
Instead, look to keep the text ratio close to 1:1 and text the other person about as frequently as they text you.
Make Someone Feel Special over Text Messages
Another trick to make someone like you over text is to stroke their ego. Let them know they’ve made a positive impact on you and that they’re still on your mind.
An example of this would be:
- “I just saw the cutest little squirrel in the park gathering nuts and it made me think of you!”
A text like this is going to make the other person feel special—and making someone feel good is a surefire way to get them to like you.
Can you fall in love through texting?
You can start falling in love through texting, but to fall in love requires more than words on a screen. Text messaging is great for getting to know someone. It can help you figure out if there is a spark of chemistry present, but to fall in love with someone, you have to spend time together and get to know each other on a deeper level. If the two of you hit it off with a good conversation over text, then move on to meeting up for a date.
Don’t spend too much time texting because it’s easy for people to lose interest. There’s more to falling in love with someone than the words, emojis, and memes they use.
In a Nutshell
Whether you want to know how to make someone like you or you’re just looking for ways to make your text convos more interesting, we’re here for you.
Remember the tips:
Have fun! If your love life isn’t fun, you’re doing it wrong.
The 5 texting habits of someone who likes you. Short response times, asks questions, easy and fluid conversation, comfortable opening up, and good morning/night texts.
Make your romantic interest smile by teasing playfully, making fun of yourself, guessing their answers, and roleplaying. Make them feel good about texting you and it will lead them to text you more.
Make them chase you by disqualifying yourself and NOT over-texting. Disqualifying yourself makes you look confident because you don’t need anyone’s validation to feel good about yourself. And keep the 1:1 text ratio so you maintain your mystery and keep them wanting more.
You can’t fall in love over text, but you can find out if there’s a spark of chemistry. If you want to fall in love, you have to spend time with someone.
If you don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up, check out Conversation Magic now to make sure your next date doesn’t crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you’ll be flirting up a storm, sparking unforgettable conversations, and attracting the high-quality humans you want to date!
Some might think that the task of making someone instantly like you is a difficult one with many variables and challenges. I look at it in much more simple terms.
It might take you forever to find the right clothes or hairstyle or anything else that might make you more physically attractive. It might take you forever to learn specific words or phrases that people might attach them selves to and like you because of. It might take you forever to read book after book or article after article about what makes someone desirable or not. It might take lots of practice to implement any of the techniques that you learned from those books, only to sometimes come to the conclusion that you’re not that likable, or that everybody can’t like everyone, or that some people are just more likable than others. To me, however, armed with the knowledge that no one remembers what you say, they may hardly remember what you look like, but they will always remember how you make them feel, gives me an insight into a realm of likability that other people are still confused by.
The idea that no one remembers what you say is a good place to start. Words do not make people like you. So spending ridiculous amounts of time trying to figure out the specific words that might make someone care, would just be a huge waste of time. The statistics, and my own practice for over 30 years working with singers and speakers, have certainly proven that the words you use hardly matter at all. So let’s not spend anymore time hunting for the right words to make people like you.
They won’t remember the way you look, because most people don’t have that kind of memory. You might be wearing some crazy red shirt that sparks their memory. But they’ll never remember whether you combed your hair on the left side or the right side or if you were wearing blue eye shadow or green eye shadow or so many other things about your physical appearance that you may have focused on that day when you got dressed for success. Most physical things are harder to remember is specificity. We might remember that person had a nice smile, or that person didn’t have any hair, but in general we don’t remember that much about the exact physical details of someone, and then use that as an important reason to like them or not. We might think, “Wow isn’t that person beautiful”, or “That person is my type, and maybe I could like them”. But most of us are not so shallow to think that appearance is a direct link to whether we like that person or not, we separate “We like the way that person looks”, from “We like the person”.
So words and looks or not the fastest way to make someone like you, so what is the most direct pipeline to likability? It happens to be the way you make them feel, because they will remember that. And how is the fastest and most reliable way to make someone feel something when they meet you? By using the sounds that come out of your mouth. Let me get more specific.
I realize there are many reasons why we might like one person over another, but in general, we like to be around happy people. When we sense happiness we are swept up in the energy that seems positive, strengthening, joyful, engaging, and fun. Happiness is most certainly contagious. When you meet someone who is smiling, laughing, joyful, and exuding elements of happiness, their energy absolutely permeates into your body and consciousness and has every chance of changing your emotions at that particular moment, from less than happy to absolutely happy.
When you meet someone who is genuinely happy and exuding that emotion, you start by being happy for that person, reacting to the energy that they are emitting. But very soon after, in seconds, as you’re feeling good for the person who is happy, your mood starts to move to being directly happy as well, that’s the contagious part of happy energy. When someone’s laughing, it makes you want to laugh. When someone is smiling, it makes you want to smile. When someone’s face is glowing with joyousness, your facial expressions change when you’re with them and engaged in conversation.
So how did you know they were happy? What sounds where they making, aside from the words, that convinced you immediately that they were truly full of happiness? One of the sounds they were creating was increased volume. When someone is happy they speak louder. Not the kind of louder that triggers the feeling of anger, but the kind of louder that comes from fullness and richness and purpose and joy. That kind of loud is filled with air exiting the body, and the combination of that air and the vocal cords vibrating more fully, create a thick, rich, beautiful sound where the volume is anything but angry, it is most certainly the sound of happy.
I’ve often mentioned that you can’t just increase your volume and showcase happy. You have to mix volume and melody together at the same time to be perceived as happy. So as my volume increases I need to also increase my Melody, going high and low like any great song would. Interestingly enough, most happy songs are songs that have a lot of higher notes, because higher pitches do create more energetic, joyful emotion. For those of you that have heard me speak or read any of the things that I publish, you know that I believe singing and speaking are basically the same thing, that the brain doesn’t differentiate between singing and speaking, because we use the same vocal cords and the same airstream to do both. So the way I teach people to speak creates the same emotions and feelings, and the same statistics apply.
There was a recent article in Time.com that talks about how
singing /speaking releases chemicals in the brain that alleviate depression and makes you happy. Here’s a little section of it:
The elation from singing may come from endorphins, a hormone released by singing, which is associated with feelings of pleasure. Or it might be from oxytocin, another hormone released during singing, which has been found to alleviate anxiety and stress. Oxytocin also enhances feelings of trust and bonding, which may explain why still more studies have found that singing lessens feelings of depression and loneliness. A very recent study even attempts to make the case that “music evolved as a tool of social living,” and that the pleasure that comes from singing together is our evolutionary reward for coming together cooperatively, instead of hiding alone, every cave-dweller for him or herself.
So if singing and speaking correctly actually makes you happy, it can make the people around you also feel happy, and that’s the fastest way I know to have them decide they like you. We live in a mirror culture. We want to surround ourselves with people like us. If we can display happy, others will easily want to join that group and stay there. That’s a direct link to being LIKED.
The opposite is also true. How many times have you met someone who has low volume, who’s melodies sound depressing? When you hear people with low voices and no melody, who clearly sound unhappy, it’s impossible not to get swept up in that negative emotion and feel unhappy as well. So the fastest way to make someone like you, is to come across happy, because they want to share that emotion and be happy themselves. And the fastest way to make someone not like you, is to come across as unhappy, because they don’t want to spend one more second feeling to sad themselves, and more unhappy than they need to feel.
So if you have any desire to learn how to instantly make someone else like you, you need to start with the sounds that are coming out of your mouth, and realize which ones are actually the happy ones. Are you using enough melody? Is your melody going up when you get to commas and periods or staying on the same note? Are you using low pitches when you speak or higher ones? Because I just explained how the higher pitches can stimulate people’s emotions and release chemicals into the brain that make them physically and emotionally happy, and then like you more. Are you using volume without using more melody? If so, then your volume is potentially being perceived as angry, and you being angry at them will absolutely not make them like you. However, if you’re matching the right amount of volume and melody, and your physicality is also showcasing happy, you have a smile, your eyebrows are lifted, there’s a lot of energy exuding from your body, your hands are not in your pockets, and your eyes are not droopy and sad, then people will be drawn to you and your energy, feel something special, and instantly like you.
Record yourself with more volume and melody. Practice this until you like the way it sounds, and it makes you feel happy. When you can get there, and showcase those sounds to everyone you communicate with, they will LIKE YOU.
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Nobody can be liked by everybody, but sometimes it’s important for your social life or your career to become more likeable. And it’s possible. Channel your inner social jiujitsu master and get almost anyone to like you. Becoming more liked might just be as easy as taking some extra interest in their life and interests!
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Ask people about themselves. Be interested in them. What conversation is better than with a person who is genuinely interested in what you are saying? If you are in a conversation and hear yourself saying «I did this, I did that,» stop yourself. Ask the other person’s opinion. Conversations are two-way streets!
- It is always better to mean what you are saying. People know when you have false humility. Setting out to show interest in people about whom you really don’t care just for the sake of gaining popularity doesn’t work in the long run, so become the sort of person who is truly interested in others! If a particular topic is really difficult for you to feign interest, steer the conversation in a different direction.
- Remember—people enjoy being around someone who is engaged, interactive, and honest. Be genuine and authentic to yourself, identify your interests and values, and align yourself with people who share them.
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Ask for a favor. This one may sound kind of funny if you’re not familiar with it — it’s a technique known as the «Benjamin Franklin Effect.» Basically, you ask for a favor, the other person does it for you, you thank them, and they end up liking you more. You’d think that the person having something done for them would like the other, but it’s not so. So the next time you feel the need to borrow something, don’t hesitate to ask!
- The idea here is that everyone likes being useful and everyone prefers to have someone indebted to them — instead of having debts to others. They gain a sense of power and purpose from you, causing them to like you more.[1]
Just don’t do it all the time — too many favors and you become pesky.
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- The idea here is that everyone likes being useful and everyone prefers to have someone indebted to them — instead of having debts to others. They gain a sense of power and purpose from you, causing them to like you more.[1]
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Talk about what interests the other person. If you know their hobbies or passions, ask! This will usually get them going non-stop and take the heat off you! They will go on and on feeling like you two are having an epic conversation when really you’ve been resigned to nodding because you can’t get a word in edgewise. If you can remember something they mentioned in passing, they’ll be doubly impressed.
- Take opportunities to use their name. People love hearing their name. As Dale Carnegie puts it, to them it is the sweetest sound in the entire language.[2]
It validates them and subsequently they feel reassured and happier. If you can slip it in, do so. - Always be aware of people who are speaking and listen to what they have to say without interrupting. It’s totally okay to disagree with them, but make sure that you’re polite and respectful of other people’s viewpoints while being honest about your own.
- Take opportunities to use their name. People love hearing their name. As Dale Carnegie puts it, to them it is the sweetest sound in the entire language.[2]
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Be empathetic. Pretty straightforward and logical, huh? But oddly enough, even though humans (on some level) know this, it’s so much easier not to do it. We’re all concerned with me, me, me and waiting for the next time we can add to a conversation. To amplify your likeability, turn the spotlight over to the other person. Focus on understanding them.
- A simple turn of phrase can do the trick. Let’s say someone is explaining to you a recent problem of theirs. Your automatic response is, «I understand how you feel.» That should seem fairly harmless, right? But you’ve just put the focus on you and your abilities — and what’s more, the other person may be thinking, «No. You don’t.» Instead, opt for something less clichéd (and thus more meaningful, even if it is ultimately self-serving) like, «So you feel like X, X, and X.» Just reiterating what they’re saying will make them feel paid attention to and, well, good.
- It’s important to always be open and accepting of others. Acting closed-off can make you seem judgmental, which will deter people from wanting to engage with you.
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Flatter them. Another one that seems really obvious. Unfortunately, paying others compliments sometimes can be awkward (lots of people don’t know how to handle them!) and seem as if you have ill motivations (a relationship, for example). For starters, get over yourself. Everyone loves it. Well, a genuine, well-timed one, at least!
- Make sure your flattery is purposeful and appropriate. If someone clearly had a rough night and still has the grime on their skin from the floor of a neglected public bathroom, don’t tell them how beautiful they look. Compliments need to be genuine in order to be appreciated and taken seriously.
- Telling a guy that you like his tie is well and good, but what would he say back? «Thanks, it was made by children in a far away factory and I had nothing at all to do with it?» Okay, so he probably won’t say that, but you get the point. Compliment him on his awesome Powerpoint presentation, his sense of humor, something that matters to him or something that he actually worked on. He’ll love the validation.
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Embarrass yourself. Once we reach the ripe ol’ age of about 5 1/2, we start realizing that society is looking at us 24/7 and certain behaviors are viewed as just wrong and welcome in scrutiny. Since humans can’t stand scrutiny, we avoid it like the plague. Unfortunately, those embarrassing moments still happen to all of us, so when we see it happen to someone else, we feel their pain. And that person? We like them more for it.[3]
- When you see someone, let’s say, caught with their pants down, there is an automatic reaction on both of your parts. The pant-less probably laughs (hopefully), turns a little red, maybe cracks a joke, shakes their head, face-palms, and tries to go about their day with a shred of dignity. What have they done? They’ve shown you that they are human. They brought down a peg and acknowledged it by their behavior. That’s likeable. They’re real.
- Let’s say the same situation happened again, but with a different person. This time they keep a stoic face, situates their drawers back up, gives a terse nod, and goes on their way. Not at all endearing. Their behavior didn’t accept their embarrassment and therefore there’s nothing to relate to, to sympathize with, or to find charming. Not likeable in the slightest.
- When you see someone, let’s say, caught with their pants down, there is an automatic reaction on both of your parts. The pant-less probably laughs (hopefully), turns a little red, maybe cracks a joke, shakes their head, face-palms, and tries to go about their day with a shred of dignity. What have they done? They’ve shown you that they are human. They brought down a peg and acknowledged it by their behavior. That’s likeable. They’re real.
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Touch them. Straight up, if you want to feel a connection with a person, you touch them. Obviously every relationship is different and thus different levels of touching are good — but in general, it’s effective at establishing a bond.[4]
The slightest one will do!- Imagine greeting someone briefly as you walk by with a quick «Hi.» It was a fleeting moment where it seemed as if you didn’t have time for the other person. Now, imagine the same scenario where you walk by quickly, give a short hello, but you lightly touch their shoulder. Bam! Physical connection. Focus. You’re on their radar — like, like, and like.
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Make them feel good. Another big duh, huh? The overarching theme of this article is really just making the other person feel good. It’s how you do it where the options come in. Every person is a bit different, but we all share similar qualities. We all want attention, to be happy, and to feel like we’re cared for and useful. And for those people that gives us those things, we like them.
- It’s best to use a number of tactics to accomplish this. Just flattery, or just asking for favors, or just smiling won’t do it. You’ve got to sprinkle them all in. If you keep the focus on them, that should prep you for action — asking questions (attention), complimenting (building them up), looking for advice (making them feel wise and purposeful), and showing empathy (being cared for). When they feel good about themselves, they’ll feel good about you.
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1
Smile. The absolute simplest way to get people to like you is to smile genuinely. People crave being around others that are fun and happy because it’s contagious — you’ll make them feel good just by being present. Smiling is the first indicator (and the most obvious) that you are a person they probably want to be around. Smile and you’re in.
- Remember, if you act like you are happy, you’ll probably feel happier. Don’t force a fake smile — others will be able to detect it — but do know that if you’re in not so great of a mood, sometimes faking it can fool your mind into feeling better.
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Use a comfortable level of eye contact. This one hopefully comes naturally. Eye contact is one of the simplest ways to show someone you’re paying attention. When you’re watching TV, you look at it, right? So when you’re talking to someone, shouldn’t you do the same thing?
- Too little eye contact can be seen as rude. Where else are you looking at? What is distracting you? Why isn’t the conversation at hand good enough to warrant your attention? If this is a problem of yours, simply be aware of it. That’s all you need to change it!
- Too much eye contact can make the other uncomfortable. It may come off as you staring the person down. If you’re aware that intense eye contact is a problem of yours, make it a point to fidget once in a while. Odds are the conversation also involves hands, food, or some other thing to draw your attention away — but only briefly.
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3
Tilt your head towards the other person. The science behind this one is that evolutionarily, tilting our head exposes our carotid artery, telling the other person that we aren’t looking for a fight.[5]
Somewhere in the depths of our brains, it cues us that the person we’re talking to isn’t a threat and that we can proceed comfortably.- Tilting the head avoids a «squaring off» stance. It’s softer, has a sympathetic flair, and tells the other that your focus is on them — something everyone absolutely adores to have. So the next time you’re unsure what stance to take, tilt away. It’s a catch-all, really.
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4
Give a quick eyebrow flash. This may be one of the non-verbal cues you’re not even aware of. So maybe you already do it! A common sign to show friendliness (and, again, that you’re non-threatening) is to do a quick eyebrow flash — just moving them up and down slightly and quickly. It’s generally done upon approaching a person and can be seen from far distances.[6]
- Combine this with a smile and you have the basic set up for any likeable, approachable human. But keep the eyebrow flash to the initiation of a conversation — it’s not something to be used at random intervals, like the head tilt may be.
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5
Mirror their positioning. If you find yourself in the same body position as someone else, odds are you’re probably on similar trains of thought.[7]
You probably do this with those around you more often than you realize. The good news here is that you can use it to your advantage! People like people who are similar to them, and this is one very easy way to do it.- If you’re talking to a person and they’re in a similar body position to you, you’re likely to feel like they’re on the same page as you are — and are thus understanding and relate-able (score). Do this in conversation but don’t draw attention to it — if it’s too noticeable, it’ll seem contrived and unnatural.
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6
Don’t assert your dominance. Many books you read will tell you to square your shoulders, throw your chin up, and always keep a firm handshake. While these are definitely good ideas and have their place, in some situations you may not want to come off as strong. Keep these confidence indicators, but throw in a few I-clearly-respect-you signals to even the playing field.
- Whomever you meet, showing a little deference won’t hurt you. If you’re meeting someone and about shake hands, step forward to them and lean in a little (alluding to a bow). Tilt your head, keep an open body position (not always crossing arms and legs, namely), and lean to one side or the other. Showing you’re relaxed and interested in the other person will cue them to like you regardless of the conversation level.
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Spend time with people who improve your image. Unfortunately, all humans look for quick, go-to signals to jump to judgments of the people they meet. No, it’s not always accurate, but we all do it because it’s easy and relatively painless. We see a situation and we assess it on its outward appearance automatically. If we don’t like it, we write it off. So when you’re being judged, know that it’s not just you, it’s what you come with.
- This is sort of a nice way to say…well, that you’re judged by the people around you, too. If your friends are all smelly trolls but you’re not, you risk being lumped in the smelly troll category, regardless. This is especially true for Facebook — the prettier your Facebook friends are, the prettier you seem to be.[8]
No, it’s not right, but it is real.
- This is sort of a nice way to say…well, that you’re judged by the people around you, too. If your friends are all smelly trolls but you’re not, you risk being lumped in the smelly troll category, regardless. This is especially true for Facebook — the prettier your Facebook friends are, the prettier you seem to be.[8]
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Dress to impress. You know how they say «dress for the job you want, not the job you have?» It’s like that. Dress for the image you want people to see, not how you feel or what you are. People are easily fooled by clothing. «The clothes make the man,» right? How many more figures of speech do you need?
- In a recent study, wearing brand names was shown to heighten one’s perceived status. Quality of clothing didn’t matter, but slapping on a luxury label made participants view the wearer as high-status and, on a related note, more likeable.[9]
It’s another cue that humans jump to for a quick answer to a person. It may not be fool-proof (or the right thing to do), but it’s easy.
- In a recent study, wearing brand names was shown to heighten one’s perceived status. Quality of clothing didn’t matter, but slapping on a luxury label made participants view the wearer as high-status and, on a related note, more likeable.[9]
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Do something to be remembered. This one can’t get super specific because whatever you do has to fit your personality, but having a «thing» can make you likeable. You’ll be memorable, have a concrete identity (or so they think), and people will be able to get a grip on you. «Hey! That’s the guy with the parrot! I love that guy!» Something like that.
- If you’ve ever worked in the restaurant industry, you may have a story that relates to this phenomenon. Think of the customer that always tips in $2 bills. After a visit or two, the waiters are fighting over him. Why? He has a thing. He’s easily remembered, distinguished, and interesting. He’s liked.[10]
- If you’ve ever worked in the restaurant industry, you may have a story that relates to this phenomenon. Think of the customer that always tips in $2 bills. After a visit or two, the waiters are fighting over him. Why? He has a thing. He’s easily remembered, distinguished, and interesting. He’s liked.[10]
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Stay under control. Quite obviously, people don’t like to be around loose cannons. When they don’t know what to expect, they get uncomfortable and tense. Try to keep a laid back, calm, and happy attitude, even when something doesn’t go your way. People you don’t know well may easily get turned off by displays of difficulty, neuroticism, and unwarranted insecurity.
- That’s not to say to hide your emotions! No, no, no. You want to be genuine. If something upsets you, let it upset you. If people don’t like it, well, they won’t like it. But before you start going off, choose your battles. Is it worth the judgment? If so, proceed. If not, reassess your reaction to the situation at hand.
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5
Know your audience. Different age levels, groups, and types of people are looking for different things in friends and partners. The older you get, the less phased and dramatic your network should become. Because of this, different personas may be more effective on different people. Know who you’re dealing with and what they’re looking for.
- Things are different in middle and high school than they are in the adult world. It pains wikiHow to say it, but at these ages, you may be better liked if you’re a little mean and selfish. A recent study showed that an individual’s popularity rose when they were a bit of a bully.[11]
This is because at that age, other kids look to strength as an example of what’s good, not knowing that that’s not how things work. In short, kids are mean.
- Things are different in middle and high school than they are in the adult world. It pains wikiHow to say it, but at these ages, you may be better liked if you’re a little mean and selfish. A recent study showed that an individual’s popularity rose when they were a bit of a bully.[11]
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Practice basic rules of hygiene. No one will want to be around someone who stinks, literally and metaphorically. So, take regular showers or baths, wash your hair, shave if you need to, brush and floss your teeth, comb your hair, use breath mints or minty gum, clip/clean your nails, use deodorant, change clothes, clean your hands, etc. Pretty doable stuff!
- Think of this as an investment into yourself. The time it takes to look good (and feel good!) will warrant you benefits in the future. Not only is it good for getting people to like you, but it’s good for your health, too.
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Like yourself. Straight up, if you don’t like you, why should anyone else? That inner negativity will seep through your day-to-day actions and people will see it. And why not like yourself? You’re awesome. At least as awesome as the people around you.
- Don’t try to be someone you’re not; it’ll show if you try. Know who you are, and adjust these tips to your personality. It pays off in the long run, even if you march to the beat of your own drum. Any changes you try to force will just wear away with time, so it’s best to be natural from the get-go.
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Use your sense of humor. Chances are you have one, so use it! If you can make a person laugh, you’re in! Just be careful to make the jokes appropriate to the setting. Offending people is not the goal here — making them smile is.
- If you don’t think you’re funny, don’t worry about trying to be funny. You probably have a sense of humor that’s a bit different from the norm. Maybe you’re sarcastic, maybe you’re quirky, maybe you’re ridiculously smart — any of those can be turned into comedic moments. Take what you have in your kit and run with it. It can be morphed into hilarity.
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Question
How do I become a better conversationalist?
Dr. Sirvart Mesrobian is a Clinical Psychologist based in West Los Angeles and Glendale, California. Specializing in individual, family, and couples treatment for young adults and adults. Dr. Mesrobian provides Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, motivational interviewing, trauma-focused treatments, and other services. She earned a Master’s in Psychology and a Doctorate of Clinical Psychology from Alliant International University.
Clinical Psychologist
Expert Answer
Give people your undivided attention without interrupting or getting distracted. You won’t seem engaged in the conversation if you’re on your phone, interrupting them, or dozing off.
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Do spend quality time with your friends while making new ones. If you don’t, you may grow apart.
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Being honest is important. Once you lie to people, they won’t believe you the next time you say something to them.
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Try to be naturally funny every once in a while so your friends will remember it.
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Don’t pretend to like something you don’t like. It usually ends up in a lost friendship.
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Don’t gossip or even participate with a group that is gossiping particularly malicious gossip: Walk away. Be the better person!
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When making eye contact with a person, make sure it’s a friendly, attentive listening form of eye contact, not the sniper-stare-down kind of eye contact.
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Don’t try to buy someone’s friendship by showering them with gifts. It makes them feel uncomfortable and feel as if they have to reciprocate. Besides, the kind of friend you would like to have isn’t a friend if they base friendship on what you can monetarily give them.
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Don’t expect too much out of other people. Be aware of how other people may react.
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Article SummaryX
To get people to like you, smile when you’re around them to show you’re a fun and happy person, which is attractive to others. When you’re talking to someone, pay them an appropriate compliment, like telling them how much you enjoyed their power point presentation or saying you like their sense of humor. You could also try asking someone for a small favor, since people like to feel useful to others. During a conversation, try to ask other people about themselves, because people feel positive towards someone who shows an interest in their interests and opinions. If you already know a lot about the other person, talk about their hobbies or interests, which will make them feel happy. Since nobody wants to be around someone with bad hygiene, make sure you shower regularly, brush your teeth, and clip your nails. For tips on how to use your sense of humor to get people to like you, keep reading!
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All people want to be liked but many of them just don’t know-how. These 10 tips will help you to build an attractive personality and teach you how to make someone like you. Every single thing you do in your life is always done to make somebody (This includes you) or something like you. It’s just a part of life that you can’t deny. Attraction and likability are what make our world go around. If we weren’t attracted to other people, our race would have died out a long time ago and I’m not just talking about the reproduction aspect of it. Because without attraction teamwork and cooperation wouldn’t exist; everybody would live for themselves.
But luckily for you attraction does exist, and you can use that to your advantage to make your life more fulfilling by learning to be a more likable person.
1. Smile
I know this step has become quite cliché but smiling in my books is the best and most powerful way to make someone like you. I mean you instantly create a connection with the other person and send the universal message of happiness and pleasure. This message 99% of the time triggers a return response from the other person in the form of a smile as well.
Why this matters is that not just do you feel emotionally connected to a smile but physically as well. Whenever you smile, a small endorphin is released in your brain which promotes a feeling of well-being and comfort. In most cases, people tend to associate this feeling with the person who helped to trigger it.
Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love. – Mother Teresa
So whenever you are in a public or are even at home try to smile as much as possible because it will make not just you but the others around you feel better.
2. Maintain Eye-Contact
Your eyes play a huge role in making someone like you because of how much communication is done through them. By maintaining eye contact with the other person you project confidence which is universally attractive.
Eye contact also signals openness and honesty, which allows the other person to feel more comfortable around you.
3. Control the Conversation
When you talk try to keep a 70% to 30% ratio in the other person’s favor, meaning you only talk 30% of the conversation while the other person talks the other 70%.
This might initially seem strange, but when you meet new people and don’t have much in common this can really help. People are very interested in themselves and if you take the time to notice they love to talk about themselves. So whenever you have a conversation let the other person do most of the talking.
You will notice at the end that you will have learned a lot more about the person which you can use in future conversations plus the fact that the other person will feel very satisfied and content that they had a good time.
Note: This doesn’t mean that you let the other person control the conversation. Keep control of the conversation by asking questions and responding when needed. Don’t become a plant.
4. Positivity and Happiness
Positivity and happiness are universally attractive and liked. Think about it for yourself. Who would you rather be around, a person who is always worrying and is sad or a person who always takes the “glass half full perspective” and is contagiously happy?
I think the answer should be quite unanimous.
A positive attitude causes a chain reaction of positive thoughts, events and outcomes. It is a catalyst and it sparks extraordinary results. – Wade Boggs
So going forward try to become a more positive and happy person and radiate your light to the rest of the world.
5. Open Posture
Unless a person is comfortable around you, they will never like you.
So to build this level of trust you should develop an open posture. Make yourself loose and have your arms to the side. Stand up straight and expose your neck. Essentially just don’t separate yourself from the world in any way.
Note: Hunching over or folding your arms and legs are big no no’s
6. Use Body Language
55% of communication is done through body language. That’s why this step is so critical in making someone like you.
You have to learn to fully utilize your entire body when you communicate. This makes you seem so much more vibrant, alive and confident. This might seem small but it makes a big difference and makes the other person feel that you care.
So for example rather than just saying yes you should nod your head, smile, and use the rest of your body to show your approval.
7. Voice
38% of communication is done through the tone of your voice.
So whenever in conversation maintain a pleasant tone and try to talk a little bit slower than the other person. This creates a contrast in your speech, which is very effective in making someone like you.
Also, try to utilize the tone of your voice to emphasize on feelings and emotions you have throughout the conversation. This makes your voice more animated and fun.
8. Concentrate
Be genuinely interested in the other person, and for those few minutes make them the only attention in your life.
9. Show Kindness and Compassion
Many a time’s people focus so much on the other things that they forget the basics when it comes to attraction. Display kindness and offer compassion wherever possible.
This will not be forgotten on the person and will help you in the process of making them like you.
10. Be Yourself and Have Fun
The more genuine you are the better it will be for the both of you. So don’t try to be somebody you are NOT and be yourself.
Friends can help each other. A true friend is someone who lets you have total freedom to be yourself – and especially to feel. Or, not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at the moment is fine with them. That’s what real love amounts to – letting a person be what he really is. – Jim Morrison
Points to Remember
For some odd reason, most people automatically associate likeability and attraction with physical appearances. These people have it all wrong. While physical appearances do play a role in likeability it is a tiny one and when you get down to it, it is your personality and behavior that really make a difference. Just think would you rather be around a beautiful person with an ugly personality or a normal person with a beautiful personality?
These steps on “how to make someone like you” don’t have particular order; put them all together in your unique way to create the ultimate effect.
Hints and Tips
- Look clean and dress accordingly, you wouldn’t attract a high-class business person wearing dirty clothes
- Maintain a high level of personal hygiene
- Never swear or use foul words, it’s extremely unattractive if for not plain rude
- Never put somebody down in your conversations, and treat everybody equal
- Don’t pretend to be somebody who you aren’t, after a while your veil will fall and that person might not be interested in who you’re not
Good luck in making someone like you! 😀
What should you send to someone you like?
To a normal, platonic friend, you can send the coolest messages and not worry about a thing.
But if you like someone, it’s like you suddenly freeze!
“How to tell someone you like them over text!?”
In this article, you will get:
- How to text a girl you like – 12+ lines you can steal from me
- Screenshot examples of Instagram DMs, WhatsApp and Facebook messengers
- The #1 word how to win a girl heart with text message
- How you SHOULD and SHOULDN’T ask someone out for a date
- A sign that someone likes you via over text
- 9 Screenshots from recent texting conversations
- And much more…
By the way, have you seen my free Transformation Kit?
You’ll get my best stuff absolutely free: 12 Opening lines that actually work, my 5 best texting tips (including copy-paste lines for Tinder), and the Friendzone Houdini. Download the Transformation Kit here.
Tip #1: Do NOT send this to someone you like
You have feelings for someone. That’s great, but it’s also dangerous.
Why dangerous?
Because your feelings don’t always help you, no matter how strong they are.
Of course, it probably feels like a good idea to eat that whole tub of Ben&Jerry’s, but it’s not a good idea.
In another instance, though, your feelings can be the way to win over your crush on chat.
You feel attraction, interest, and you want to know EVERYTHING about that person.
That can mean you start asking non-stop questions:
Any plans for the weekend?
How is school/university/work?
All that interest you show is kindly meant, but it isn’t the way how to tell a girl you like her over text.
If someone keeps asking, without adding anything, it’s going to get really boring, very quickly. Of course, it’s fine to ask questions, but make sure you also add a lot to the conversation.
Let me give you an example in the following tip!
Tip #2: How to make her fall for you over text with one word
Sometimes success can be so delightfully simple.
Research demonstrates that using one word allows you to be more successful with your online dating profile.
This means, of course, that it’s also logical that this word will help you out with your conversations on Instagram / WhatsApp / Tinder.
What is this magical word?
Simple:
Love.
Love is, of course, the one thing almost any man or woman is looking for.
But how do you use this in your chat conversations? Do you have to confess your love?
Uhhh… No.
But by using more emotional words, you can get nicer texting conversations with women. If you like someone, then don’t talk about your work emails… That’s far too dry!
(Even though as a professional dating coach, I do sometimes see chats like that from clients…)
So what should you do?
Use love as a verb. For example, don’t just say
Instead, say:
It’s got much more emotional significance, and it subtly brings ‘love’ into your conversation.
The great thing is that your conversational partner will likely mirror your language. If she does that, it’s a signal that she likes you too.
Example via WhatsApp:
This woman sends me a funny song with rather old-fashioned lyrics. The topic is:
“you’ve got to have a job, or I’m not interested in you”.
Not exactly the kind of thing you’d sing today. Here’s the song if you’d like to hear:
You see that I say ‘love it’, and she immediately mimicks my language in her next message.
Then, I send her a funny picture while I continue the joke. A funny picture says more than a thousand words. Even if it’s just an empty cottage cheese container. #bodybuilding
The next tip will give you more tips about funny pictures and video ideas to send to someone you like!
Tip #3: How to flirt with a girl over text (Instagram example)
Your first message will decide the tone of the conversation.
It’s just like the first impression in real life – don’t ruin it!
Make sure you do this the right way if you send a message to a girl you like.
I’ll give you a tip later on how to start the conversation on Instagram with someone you like but DON’T know.
Your best chances are if you already know her, of course.
What a lot of guys do wrong is that they send things like:
Hey, how’s your day going?
Hey, how was the party? 🙂
Hi, this is Dan, remember me?
Of course, that last message is VERY bad, since you imply you’re not so memorable. Apparently, she has the memory of a goldfish and forgot about you within 24 hours.
You could do much better.
Take a look at the 3 messages above, and tell me what mistakes you see.
Do it now.
Spotted?
You’ll probably say, ‘they’re boring messages.’And yes, you’re right, but that’s not the mistake.
Or you say, ‘they’re all questions!’ And yes, that’s wrong too, but that’s not the problem either.
The big mistake is that all the messages attempt to rebuild the connection, instead of referring back to the real-life interaction.
So start the conversation with a real-life joke.
Below is an example from my Instagram.
Context:
We first met on the street in the evening. We were talking together with a friend of hers and my assistant. I added her on Instagram and started looking at her pictures.
I scrolled down and found some old photos of her sitting drunk in a shopping cart. It made her blush quite a bit.
So in my first message on Instagram, I teased her when I saw she had deleted several photos:
Then I send the screenshot I happened to take, to tease her some more. She sends back ‘whyyy’ with crying emojis, but also a happy smiling smiley ‘:Dddddd’, so I know she’s responding positively.
These are not exact messages you can send, because it’s best to customize your message.
However, if you want more cut-and-paste messages, I recommend the WhatsApp cheatsheet. It will give you 25 tips and funny messages to send.
They always work, and they’re free, too. Get them here!
Up next: how to flirt with a girl over text.
Tip #4: The best technique to get flirty conversations
So you like a pretty woman, what do you send her?
If you have ever watched a series on YouTube/Netflix/whatever, this is a scientifically proven tip.
A woman mentioned on her Badoo (a dating app) profile that she was looking for ‘the Chandler to her Monica.’
Maybe that doesn’t tell you anything at all, but it’s a reference to two main characters in the series Friends.
Now I love Chandler as a character. I used to identify with his humour, so reacting to this was extra easy. The tip is not that you have to send exactly these sentences, but that you start a nice roleplaying game with her.
For example, by taking over the roles from a series, you both watch.
Here’s what I sent:
She starts the conversation on WhatsApp after I gave my number on Badoo. The roleplay had started nicely, that’s why she’s asking if I’m asleep with the addition ‘Chandler.’
Then I move on to a joke that’s also a Friends reference, from the famous episode where Ross sleeps with another woman. Rachel accuses him of cheating, but Ross claims they’ve split up.
“WE WERE ON A BREAK!”
In my last message, you’ll see, I ask her on a date. More about how to ask a girl out over text in the next tip…
Tip #5: How to ask someone you like on a date through text
A common mistake is that you don’t know what to send.
But you know one thing.
You want to ask her for a date.
That’s a noble goal, but you go too quickly. It’s as if you go all-in in a poker game!
Like this woman, who asked me out via Facebook in her very first message:
For the people trying to figure out what she actually sent:
Dan! I want to grab a drink with you!
Instead of getting the conversation going, it’s pretty risky to go for the date right away. So make sure you send fun things first. When the other seems to warm up to you, then you can go for the date.
This increases your chances of getting a ‘yes’!
That’s because you don’t know very much about the other:
- Is there a connection?
- Is he/she a fun person?
- Is this person a psycho or weirdo who’s going to stalk me?
That may sound like an exaggeration, but women especially can quickly encounter complete crazies. So especially as a man, this tip is essential.
How you DO ask someone out on a date via WhatsApp will be explained in my article on that topic!
Tip #6: How to ask someone out via WhatsApp
Then, when you have the date, there is a way to not ruin it right away. Because a lot of guys have good intentions and get bad results.
A female friend once told me about a date a few years earlier.
A guy kept insisting on dating. He liked her. After months of begging, she agreed.
Just before the date, the chat went a bit like this:
Looking forward to tonight! Can you meet me at 9:30?
Yes 🙂 What are we actually going to do?
Uhh, don’t know, what do you want to do?
That friend said he ruined the date before it even started. That’s because he didn’t take charge of the conversation; he left it up to her.
Bizarre! Because it was HIS idea to meet, so then it’s your responsibility to come up with something fun.
That’s why I’ve written an extensive article so you can get lots of inspiration. It gives you the best, original date ideas, and activities to do with the women you like:
-> 35 Exciting Date Ideas: How to Have an Unforgettable Date
Now probably the biggest hurdle for men when it comes to texting with a woman you like… The FIRST thing you write.
Tip #7: How to start texting on Instagram
Do you like a girl on Instagram, but you don’t know how to make contact?
Pay attention.
Many men send terrible chats. Think of the typical conversation starter on Tinder, such as:
Hilarious, but also tragic.
Men often have exactly the same approach on Instagram. Ask an attractive friend if you can peek into her Instagram ‘other inbox’ (where messages come from people you don’t follow), and you’ll see the same things.
So what do you do then?
The first step is simple. You follow her account. When you do, you start looking at her stories.
From now on, it’s simple. You wait until the right moment arrives.
This nice woman posted something about a Slytherin starter pack in her story. A funny Harry Potter meme.
A participant of our Tinder expert responded:
REAL Slytherin starter pack
He sends. No ass-kissing or sucking up. He fires right back at her.
And she reacts, she teases back with a funny emoji, and that’s everything you need to get the conversation started!
Now that’s how you get a girl to like you over text from the start.
Tip #8: What do you send for a fun conversation?
Both in real-life conversations and online conversations, I keep noticing the same mistake.
I’ve been a dating coach for 10+ years, and you have to be completely stupid not to recognize certain patterns.
One of those patterns is that people are too careful in their conversations.
You keep thinking things like:
“Would this be okay? Do you really like this? Would this be fun enough to send?”
That’s how your brain keeps running in circles.
If you overthink every message, your messages may come across as very filtered. That often makes them too boring. While your unfiltered self is your true authentic self, EXAGGERATE who you are, rather than holding yourself back.
Important:
Exaggerating does not mean acting like an asshole.
What I mean is: don’t make your messages so boring and dry.
Example?
I was on a plane after visiting one of my girlfriends in Stockholm. (I’m not that monogamous).
There I was in a 3-seater, with no neighbors. Lovely space for myself on the plane.
I could have said:
No neighbors on the plane, nice, that legroom!
But that’s pretty boring.
So exaggerate your messages sometimes! People like to see more emotion in what you send.
And then I respond:
Nobody’s sitting next to me on the plane, uggg heavenly
By typing the word “heavenly” and “uggg” the message already gets more emotional.
She also reacts in a funny way, by saying:
To which I respond with:
I’m manspreading the shit out of this aisle [too many emojis to repeat]
Usually, I don’t use many emojis; men often use them too much and too superfluously. But sometimes they are fun and give your crazy messages more emotional charge, just like above with all the explosions and biceps.
You can see that she likes it and keeps reacting positively.
Tip #9: What do you send if the other fails to react?
Unfortunately, this is a painful problem that you will have to deal with sooner or later. Suddenly, she stops reacting.
Especially when you like someone too much, and you start texting too much, this can suddenly stop the conversation.
That’s why I made special technique for this with example messages as a solution for someone who doesn’t react anymore.
You will find it in my free 5 texting tips. Get them here.
What’s also possible is that she still responds, but responds very curtly. That’s an entirely different problem, and you need to deal with it differently.
Tip #10: Best text to send a girl you like when she cancels the date
So you sent these nice things to that one nice person, but now it doesn’t seem to work after all.
For example, you ask her if she would like to have a drink on Thursday or Saturday, but then she says something like, “Oh no, then I can’t.”
Annoying. What’s next?
Isn’t she interested? Or doesn’t she have time?
Luckily, one of our flirting coaches has come up with a solution for you.
It’s so simple and wonderfully effective:
Perfect!
(Psst… This is the moment when you say: “Luckily, I can do another day, [your name]! Namely…”)
It can be as simple as that. Immediately she comes up with 4 times when she can actually meet up.
What is very important is that you keep the tone of the conversation fun. A lot of people interpret things negatively. They think “I can’t” means “I don’t want to see you.”
That’s what we call ‘assuming negative intentions’, where for example, you’re on a date with a yawning woman, and you think “oh, she thinks I’m boring,” while the reality is that she barely slept that night.
Maybe she barely slept because she was so nervous before the first date, thus proving the opposite of your assumption!
Always watch what assumptions you make about people, especially if they are negative in nature. That is why it is so important to stay light-hearted in your messages, like in the example above.
So the next time you’re chatting with a girl you like. And you think: “how to get here to like me over text?” Stay positive.
Kickstarting a rich online dating life
Do you want a girlfriend, or do you want to date several women for a while? All of that is possible.
As a dating coach, I’ve seen a lot of men achieve this success. Almost daily I receive stories from ex-bootcamp participants.
That’s great to read, of course. That’s why we started AttractionGym because we give advice that really works.
Of course, there’s no success without taking action. Otherwise, the best tips in the world won’t help.
Now you know how to text a girl you like.
To easily start getting better at flirting and seduction, I’ve have created the Transformation Kit for you. This dating kickstarter includes 12 opening lines that hook her immediately, plus the principles behind meeting every woman successfully. Apart from that texting tips that will end up filling your agenda with dates. And the principles behind escaping and avoiding the Friendzone. Just follow 5 steps to get out and never return.
The Transformation Kit is completely free. You can find it below to download.
I wish you good luck, rock on.
Your bro,
Dan de Ram
You’ve probably come across people in your life who seemed more likable than most people you’ve met.
Perhaps they were really comfortable admitting their weaknesses, or maybe they were good at making people laugh.
Whether you’re at the office, a party, or just out in public, you can display specific personality traits to make people take a liking to you.
When I was younger I used to focus on trying to impress people a lot. But I figured out as I got older that more often than not, if you just enjoy yourself, others will tend to enjoy you too.
These psychological tricks are good ways to make friends, get people talking to you, gain respect, and maybe even make someone attracted to you and like you back. Here are a few things you can do to get people to like you instantly or over time.
Related: What Does Success Mean? 9 Ways To Achieve It
25 Tips That Might Help You Be Everyone’s Favorite Person
1. Ask questions you’re curious to know
People like when someone wants to hear about what they know or what their story is.
If your asking a question to understand something, people also enjoy being the one to provide the answers.
This is an easy way to help you make good conversation with someone. Growing up, I was one of those people who had no idea what to say to people.
For example, when I’d be on the phone with girls, a majority of the hours I would have no idea what questions to ask.
But over time I learned to ask questions that I was genuinely curious about. I personally don’t like when people ask questions for the sake of asking questions. It makes the conversation feel forced and unnatural.
Everybody has something they’re curious to know about someone. You’ll be able to enjoy the conversation much more when you can get answers to questions you’re genuinely curious about.
And the answers could spark even deeper questions, leading to deeper conversation, making that person or people you’re with genuinely like you even more.
2. Talk more sometimes
Some people are masters at the gift of gab. They can talk constantly and people like them for it. Try expressing your thoughts and feelings about things more.
Being more introverted myself, I understand that’s not the easiest for everybody. But with a little practice, you can be a little more comfortable being communicative when you desire.
3. Selflessly give your time to others
People like others who are willing to share their time being helpful without any expectations.
It’s likely you’ve had people help you do certain work tasks or understand certain material with no expectation. My guess would be you appreciated them for that.
One thing to keep in mind when helping others is to always be genuine about it.
4. Be humble
No one likes a know-it-all. People appreciate people who are humble enough to know they may need our help or insight sometimes.
People who act like they’re the smartest or know everything come off prideful and conceited, which most people don’t find likable.
5. Be good at listening
While talking more can be good for likability, it’s also necessary to be a good listener too. Take moments to let people get a chance to respond to you with what’s on their mind.
Be curious to find out new things about the person you’re talking to.
6. Make people laugh
Just about everyone likes somebody who can make them, and others, laugh. You don’t have to be a comedian.
All you have to do is find the humor things. You’ll tend to get a smile out of most people if not a laugh.
7. Be less aggressive
While we all have our own tastes and preferences, people like others who can be flexible about things. They also like those who don’t push their preferences on them.
If you can be someone who can go with the flow easily, most people will appreciate that.
8. Relax
Yes, life can be serious and sometimes we have to be too. But don’t be someone who’s always bringing up their problems.
It drains other people and makes them less likely to find you enjoyable. Try to be someone who’s easy going and looks for the upside in most things.
9. Laugh at yourself
The people that enjoy themselves the most tend to be able to laugh at themselves and their life the most. I didn’t quite start learning this lesson until I was in high school.
One time a friend in high school made a joke about me at lunch.
It was so funny that I laughed. I can’t quite remember what he said, but it was something like, “See, Eric knows how to laugh about himself.”
The rest of my time in high school and life in general, I was able to just smile and laugh whenever people joked with me.
And oddly enough, despite the fact that I didn’t really talk much, everybody ended up being cool with me for the most part.
The people who are liked most know how to poke fun at situations they’ve been in, any mistake they make, or just about who they are as a person in general.
And doesn’t it seem like those people you come across who can laugh about themselves tend to be the most likable?
10. Be passionate about the things you like
People may not always be interested in the topics you’re into, but they can get interested just by your passion for it. I’ve spoken to many people who are big movie lovers.
I’m not really into them myself, but whenever I’ve talked to someone who was, I always got more interested in talking about movies.
The same thing is true whenever I’ve shared my passion for music or my passion for religious text. Some of the people I spoke with weren’t really into religion.
But by the time I shared all of my passion and interest about it, they got more curious to know more.
So by showing your joy for your passion, you’re enjoying yourself, and by people being more interested in you because of your passion, they’re enjoying you too.
It makes people want to talk to you more. Passion doesn’t mean you have to convey this loud excitement about something. It’s just showing how much you like what you’re into.
And by the way, it works the other way around too. Let other people share with you what they’re really passionate about and also choose to engage with them about it.
It’ll make them happy to be able to share all their thoughts and feelings about something with someone who’s actually listening.
11. Try to always enjoy your time
I believe you can enjoy your time doing almost anything. And when people see you know how to enjoy time in almost any situation, they tend to enjoy you because you know how to enjoy life.
You might be thinking right now, “What does it mean to always enjoy my time”? It’s as simple as doing one of two things that have worked for me in my life, and could work for you.
A. Pointing out whatever you find interesting about the situation you’re in.
It doesn’t have to be profound or life changing, it can just
be any random thing that catches your attention. Maybe you’re watching a movie with
someone and something stands out to you.
You could either make the other person notice that thing and they find it interesting, or the other person could end up saying to you, “Yeah, I noticed that too!”, and it creates a small instant connection.
Because usually everybody feels good when someone else notices the same thing as they did.
B. Finding a way to have fun with whatever you’re doing.
There are people in life you don’t have to do anything specific with them, you just have a good time doing whatever. You can be one of those people too.
Cracking jokes about the situation you’re in, being silly, or just making good conversation to pass the time even in the most boring situations.
I’ve had fun with people picking up trash in a stadium, sitting
in a class waiting for it to end, or just doing nothing.
12. Don’t try to always say the funniest or most interesting thing.
In the past, I used to think I had to say the funniest or most interesting thing in a conversation with someone. So I would try to be really funny, or say something really different.
More often than not, I could make people laugh just by saying what was on my mind. I’m not even trying to be funny. So you can just say what’s on your mind and see what happens.
The moment would usually end up being very awkward. Everybody wants to be able to have a conversation where someone laughs or someone finds what they said intriguing.
As far as saying something that people find interesting, just being genuine in your thoughts usually does the trick. What do you really think or feel about something?
That’s the stuff people are usually intrigued by.
13. Learn and experience the world
The more you know and the more you experience in life, the
better you’re able to relate with people. In the past I’d been told by someone
I can have a conversation about anything.
It’s because I’ve allowed myself to explore different things in life. I read and watched things out of curiosity, even if they were topics I was always the most interested in.
I’ve traveled places and I’ve tried new things. All of this adds up to me being able to talk about a lot of different subjects that other people may be interested in.
I may not have as much knowledge or experience in those topics as they do, but I’m able to keep up with the conversation.
The other person ends up enjoying that I’m able to keep up, and they end up having a positive view of me.
In addition to making better conversation, having knowledge and experiences also makes you more interesting as a person.
Because people usually enjoy knowing somebody who’s done things they’ve never done.
14. Be less of a burden
Simplicity can be your best friend. Nobody enjoys people who
are too extra or too much trouble to be around.
I know it may seem like the guy who’s the loudest and craziest in the room looks cool, but it does get old eventually.
People can actually enjoy someone who’s just chill and doesn’t feel the need to say something all the time.
I’ve found many people enjoy being around me just because I have a different positive chill energy they don’t often encounter.
Most people talk too much and can’t seem to ever stop acting crazy all the time.
Believe me, you’ll be a much welcomed relief to someone. Having said all that, if you have a loud and colorful personality, that’s fine, just maybe turn it down a notch every now and then.
15. Send funny or interesting stories and videos from time to time
With a few friends in the past, I would send them stuff that they might find interesting or funny. Since I’m into music, it was mostly songs and artists.
When people like the stuff you send, it creates a positive association in their mind with you.
They associate you with humor, or uniqueness, or just overall good taste in things in life.
Now of course sometimes people aren’t going to like some of the stuff you send, but it still gives you success.
You’re showing that you think about that person. People like to know people are thinking about them, whether it’s reaching out for a call, or just sending something to add a little light in their day.
You’ll not only be more likable, but also make people feel like you’re one of the coolest person in their lives.
16. Give people information they might find useful
For a time period when I was unemployed, I had a few friends
that would send me job listings that they saw. I was really appreciative of it
and found myself liking those people more.
I would do the same by sending ads for jobs or other potential opportunities they’d might find useful. Maybe you know an issue or question that someone’s been trying to figure out an answer to recently.
Perhaps they’re trying to get rid of an item and you know somebody who’d be interested in it.
When you solve people’s problems or give people new ideas they might not have thought of that could help them out, you’ll be very appreciated for doing that. This will quickly make someone into a friend.
17. Be courteous
Courtesy can seem to be a lost art in society these days. Exhibiting it can pleasantly surprise some people.
Hold the door open for people who are walking behind you. Try not to interrupt people when they’re speaking. Say thank you if someone did a kind act for you.
It may all seem like common sense, but you’d be surprised how many people don’t think to do these small actions.
18. Stay respectful when you disagree
In these divisive times, it seems harder than ever for people to respectfully disagree.
Sometimes people are going to disagree with something you say, but they’ll still like you if you actually show you can respect their difference of opinion.
I’ve been in conversations with people who I’ve had very strong disagreements with.
But instead of pushing back and telling them they’re wrong, I would engage them in what they believe through just asking questions.
You can always find one bigger picture thought in their
point of view that you can agree with.
Example: You express you believe in free college tuition. The other person says they believe in people earning their way to college.
You can say, “Well, it’s definitely important for people to get an education, and hopefully we find the best ways possible to help more people afford that opportunity”
No insults, no belittling comments, just peaceful discussion, which will be very refreshing and likable to the person you’re in conversation with. Not only that, it will get people to respect you.
19. Rarely ask for favors
There’s a line of thinking out there that asking for favors can help make people genuinely like you more.
It’s true to an extent, but I think people also really like someone who doesn’t ask for favors.
Think about it. If someone knows you don’t always need them for something, they know that you really want to be a friend of theirs just for the sake of being their friend.
In fact, beyond liking you more, they’ll probably offer to do stuff for you without even asking.
I think the better understanding to have on favors is to do them for others.
If someone is going through something in life, ask them if there’s anything you can do for them, or offer them some ideas to help them.
In that situation, even if the person says “Thanks, but I’ll be fine”, they’ll appreciate that. They’ll know if they ever need someone, you’ll be there to help them. That’s how to be likable.
20. Offer people food
While this may comes across unconventional, people like food. If you happen to know how to cook or bake, or have enough to buy a dish, next time bring something tasty for the office to enjoy.
It could be something as simple as cookies. This goes back to creating a positive association in someone’s mind with you.
If they eat the food and really like it, that’s huge bonus points for you on a person’s likability scale.
21. Don’t be a fake
There have been people I’ve encountered in life who just come off completely fake to me. I could sense the BS in the words immediately and wanted nothing to do with them.
The best way I can describe it is the person would sound overly friendly, overly nice or they would just be trying to sound funny in a too good to be true kind of way.
They would just sound like every word they were saying was an attempt to look and sound like an amazing person.
You don’t have to sound super nice or super friendly to be liked. Just simply be you and be sincere
22. Be relaxed
If you’re tense, usually the people around you will feel tense too. For some of you, it can probably be really nerve wrecking being in social situations.
You’re really hoping to have a good time and that other people will genuinely like you. I know how that feels.
I’ve had my own anxiety issues from time to time. But the more you get yourself in these situations, the easier it’ll get.
But while you’re building the experience, try to be more aware of what your body is feeling, and adjust yourself in the moment.
Be mindful to make sure your shoulders are low, your arms and legs aren’t crossed, and just allow your body to be loose.
As you’re being relaxed, you help others who may be just as nervous feel less tense.
I wrote about a technique called autogenic training that helped me to relax more. You can check it out here. Over time it helped me reduce my daily stress and anxiety.
Anytime you can make someone go from a physically bad feeling to a physically good feeling, you’ve gotten yourself some huge bonus points with them.
23. Remember what people tell you
I’ve had people be extremely surprised when I bring up stuff they mentioned once before in conversation.
It shows that you listened and it shows that you care about them, increasing your likability.
Remember the little things like that one feeling or situation they don’t like, and remember the big things like what they’re most proud of or what their dreams are.
24. Be Dependable
If you say you’re going to do something, do it. People nowadays tend to not keep their commitments. They even choose not to have the courtesy of letting someone know they have to cancel.
Whenever I’ve made a commitment to be somewhere and do something with someone, I’ve done my best to keep it.
Even in times where I wasn’t feeling the best, I tried to always show up for the time I scheduled with someone
I can tell you it’s made those I’ve met in life admire me and like me more.
Just think, with so many people failing to be dependable these days, that can make you stand out to others in a really good way.
That increases your chances of being liked, being a close friend, or maybe even being much more
25. Take Care Of Yourself
You’re probably wondering what does taking care of yourself have to do with people liking you. You’ll be surprised to know it can actually play a pretty big role.
For starters, if you exercise, eat well, and get enough sleep, you’re probably a decent looking person.
And as vain as it may sound, people do tend to like those who look good more than those who don’t.
But even deeper is something that matters much more than that. If you’re not taking care of yourself as well as you need to, you’re not able to be your best self.
I have a morning routine that keeps me motivated in taking care of myself. I wrote an article where I shared some simple habits to start your day off right.
Because when you take care of yourself properly, you feel good, and when you feel good, you become more likable.
You smile more, engage more, you’re being more positive, and doing all the little things that have been mentioned so far that make people like us.
When you’re not taking care of yourself properly, you usually don’t feel good.
You’re likely more negative, less engaged, insecure, and just giving off a vibe that makes others not interested in being around you.
Really start taking care of yourself, and you might notice a huge difference in how you interact with others, and how others interact with you. They might start to genuinely like you.
How do you know if people really like you?
You know if people really like you by their actions. How much do they spend time with you?
How much do they go out of their way to talk to you and do things for you? Those are all signs that a person genuinely likes you.
Final thoughts on being likable
Some will dislike you no matter what you do, and that’s fine. Knowing how to be likable isn’t about making everyone happy.
The point is all of this will make you seem more likeable than not. It’ll give you more of a chance to make friends or just have a good time in life.
As I like to say, “If no one else enjoys you, at least you enjoyed yourself.”
Motivational Video on Making People Like You
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9 Awesome Tips on How to Make Someone Like You
Relationships cannot be forced into being, but there are some situations where it is important to know how to make someone like you. If there is someone special that you want to be friends with, or someone you find interesting who you’d like to know better, or someone you have a crush on but not very close to — a little manipulation so that the person gets to know you, and like you, may be a good idea at hand.
9 Awesome Tips on How to Make Someone Like You
Knowing how to make someone like you may not be an exact science, but there are certain steps and tricks that you can follow to make the process easier.
1
Be Available, And Unavailable
It is important that you keep yourself close to the person as much as you can, but at the same time, not give them the feeling that you are always available. In order for someone to like you, they would have to get to know you first, and that requires physical proximity.
Be where you know that person is probably going to be; you need to be around them so that they are aware of your existence. Try to interact with other people instead of always starring at them wistfully; be friendly and approachable but not too available for them so that they cannot take you for granted. Wait until they are aware of you and know you, and then make yourself less available.
2
Show Your Interest in Them as a Person
Since it is you who are initially interested in knowing each other, you have to show it. Approach the person and engage in a conversation, be as friendly and attentive as you can. Show that you are interested in knowing them further; if applicable, give them the reason you are interested, i.e. something that they had said previously that you liked, or some common interest that you both share. This will give them a chance to know you a little, and let them show their interest in knowing you, too.
3
Ask Question That Show Your Attention
One sure way to know how to make someone like you is to know to ask questions about them. We all love to answer queries about ourselves — about our interests, about our life, and about our plans and dreams. Asking questions are also a sure way to show someone that you are interested in knowing them further.
Besides, when you are asking appropriate question about someone’s life, it gives them an opportunity to ask the same questions about you — which would indicate that they are also interested in getting to know you.
4
Be Genuinely Interested in Them
Looking for ways of how to make someone like you requires you to be genuinely interested in them. If you are asking the right questions that get them talking about themselves, you have to concentrate fully on what they are talking about. Not polite acknowledgement or fake sympathy, but actual interest that will make them feel appreciated and noticed.
If this is a person that you are genuinely interested in knowing and forging a relationship with, you need to be the perfect listener. Pay attention to what they are talking about so that you are able to ask the right questions and nudge them the proper way, and so that you are both able to carry a meaningful conversation with each other, not just small talk and chitchat.
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Make Regular Eye Contact
Making eye contact is another certain way to let someone know what you feel about them, whether they are someone you are really interested in, or just someone you consider polite company. If you want to know how to make someone like you, you have to understand the important role that meaningful and effective eye contact can play.
Locking eyes with someone, or regularly looking directly into their eyes, sends a very powerful message to the person — a message saying that this is a relationship that you are interested in continuing. On the other hand, when two people in a conversation don’t look at each other but away, it means they are just talking to be polite and social. Therefore, when talking to the person you want to like you, be sure to make regular eye contact so that they do not miss the signs.
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Make Them Feel Appreciated
Everyone loves to be appreciated by other people, and to make someone feel cherished is to help them develop feelings for you. Being a good listener and asking the right questions at the right time can help a person feel acknowledged and heard.
However, a person truly feels treasured when another person understands them. Find out what they are most passionate about in their lives and compliment on that — i.e. on their career, their hobby, their skill, their business. Validating someone on a topic they feel strongly about will definitely make them warm up to you.
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Smile, As Often As Possible
A little smile goes a long way, so don’t forget to give them your most genuine smile whenever the occasion calls for it. A smile makes everyone look more attractive, as well as more interesting, and it is a great way to make someone like you.
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Add Some Physical Contact to the Equation
Besides smiling, a little appropriate touching every now and then is also a good idea; nothing too obvious, just a few seconds on the arm or the shoulder. Touching is a part of non-verbal communication, and quite effective in showing mutual interest and liking between two people!
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Above All, Be Honest
There’s nothing better than be honest with the person you hope will like you back someday. So after you have done everything you can to make them like you, be completely honest about your intentions. You don’t actually have to ask them to like you, but just be clear about the notion that you want to continue knowing them further, and that you wish to carry on your conversations together. This will remove any doubt they might have had about you, and they would probably appreciate your straightforwardness and honesty.