Which swear word are you

Posted on Oct 28, 2019

Get the soap ready because you’re going to need to wash your mouth out.

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What were the first words you learnt in English? If you started learning as an adult, after you nailed hello and goodbye, I’ll bet that fuck wasn’t far behind. Some English swear and curse words are almost universally understood; you can tell someone to fuck off in any country in the world and people get it. We will give you an overview of bad words in English but beware: It is not appropriate in certain settings to use those!

• When swearing in English – what is offensive and what isn’t?
• The most common swear word in British English
• The most common swear word in American English

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When swearing in English – what is offensive and what isn’t?

Very few swear words are truly offensive in the UK nowadays. Swearing is acceptable in workplaces and among friends, even in families. It’s up to you on an individual basis to work out when you can use these words. So if your British friend tells you to fuck off, don’t immediately assume you should be offended. Because there’s more than one way to use fuck off and understanding this, and many other swear words, will make you a better English speaker. Never forget culture and context when learning a language.

So let’s dive in. 

The most common swear word in British English

1. Fuck

What a brilliantly diverse word fuck is. Used on its own, it usually signifies annoyance:

“Ah fuck, the kettle’s broken, how am I going to make tea?”. 

Fuck can be joined to other words to change its meaning. Fuck off for example can mean get away from me, or it can be used to signify surprise or shock. It all depends on the context and how you say it.

“Nice tits.”

“Fuck off.” (Leave me alone, you sad, lonely creep.)

“I’m pregnant and it’s triplets.”

“Fuck off!” (Hopefully not coming from the father of the triplets, but a likely shocked reaction from friends.)

“I just won £1 million on the lottery.”

“Fuck off!” (A nice surprise, probably.)

Fuck is also a vulgar way to say have sex as in “We fucked last night.” But this phrase makes you sound like an overexcited teenage boy, so it’s one not to use. Learn more about the use of diverse English words that might not always make sense.

2. Piss off

Another phrasal verb, piss off is a milder version of fuck off. However, it’s still probably not one to use in front of grandma. It usually means go away, but your tone of voice has a big impact on its meaning. 

“You look lovely today, Jean.” 

“Oh, piss off Greg.” (Depending on the tone of voice, Jean is either angry or flirting. It’s an important distinction Greg will have to make himself.)

It can also be used to express surprise or shock:

“James is coming for a drink tonight.”

“Piss off, he never comes out on Wednesdays.”

3. Bugger off

With a similar meaning to piss off, bugger off is very British. When a Brit says this to an American it usually causes them to giggle and swoon over the accent rather than be offended. And again, it can be used forcefully to tell someone to go away, or playfully to flirt with someone. 

“Drinking wine again, Carol?”

“Oh, bugger off.” (Again, is Carol angry, playful or flirting? Tone of voice and a cheeky smile will give her away.)
Don’t forget to put on your best British accent for this expression!

4. Bloody hell

This is another very British swear word. Bloody hell is actually quite mild and it’s used to express anger. 

“Bloody hell, Yuri’s lost the tickets to the concert.”

“Yuri, what the bloody hell have you done?”

Learn how to gossip in English and get all the juicy details!

5. Bastard

The earliest definition of bastard is a child with unmarried parents, but the word has morphed away from that. Now bastard is used to call someone nasty or unpleasant. It’s usually used to talk about men:

“The bastard cheated on me.”

It’s also used in Britain to say that something is difficult or unpleasant to do:

“Commuting into London every day is a bastard.”

If you want to experience bastard in a strong northern accent, see this video featuring the brilliant actor, Sean Bean.

6. Wanker/tosser

These are more swear words which are usually directed at men. They mean a stupid or unpleasant person. 

“Ah Yuri you wanker, how did you lose the tickets?”

“Logan’s a tosser. He never pays for his drinks.”

7. Bollocks

One of the greatest British swear words is bollocks. It means testicles, but it’s used in some wonderful ways, most often to exclaim when something has gone wrong:

“The train’s delayed and we’re going to miss our flight.”

“Bollocks!”

It’s also used to call out a liar:

“I’ve been working hard on this all day.”

“Bollocks! You were playing computer games for most of the morning.”

And it can be used as a verb, to mean a telling off. 

“My boss bollocked me for coming in late three times this week.”

The most common swear word in American English

1. Motherfucker

A more American swear word, although it is used in other countries too, is motherfucker. This is not a word that’s used literally (not very often, anyway). We use it to talk about someone we really dislike or who has made us angry. We don’t just use it for people, we can use it for things and situations too. 

“I crashed your car… I’m really sorry.”

“My new car?! You motherfucker!”

“I heard you’re getting divorced.”

“Yeah, it’s a motherfucker.”

You can also use motherfucker affectionately, especially when you’re impressed with something someone’s done. 

“I got a 1400 on my SATs.”

“You clever motherfucker!”

And it can be turned into an adjective. 

“I can’t get the motherfucking waffle maker to turn on!”

2. Son of a bitch

In the US, you’re much more likely to hear someone being called a son of a bitch rather than a bastard. 

Like bastard, you can use son of a bitch to talk about people and things. 

“That son of a bitch insulted me.”

“Why didn’t you take the elevator?”

“The son of a bitch is broken.”

You can also use it as an exclamation. 

“Son of a bitch! I spilled my beer everywhere.”

And you can use it to say that a man is impressive or that you admire him, often grudgingly. 

“The son of a bitch has done it. He’s won the competition.”

3. Asshole

Asshole is another American swear word that is more often used for men. It describes a stupid or unpleasant person. It’s not a particularly strong swear word and like all of them on this list, there’s a time and a place to use it, and it’s not in class or at family dinner. In British English, you’re more likely to hear someone being called an arsehole. 

“I can’t believe the asshole forgot my birthday.”

“Stop being an asshole! I’m going to tell mom.”

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Just to be clear, we are not encouraging you to start swearing at your lovely English teachers (‘bugger off, I’m not doing that homework,’ is actually quite offensive). But now you should be able to enjoy some great British banter with a side of swear words thrown in.

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Laura is a freelance writer and was an ESL teacher for eight years. She was born in the UK and has lived in Australia and Poland, where she writes blogs for Lingoda about everything from grammar to dating English speakers. She’s definitely better at the first one. She loves travelling and that’s the other major topic that she writes on. Laura likes pilates and cycling, but when she’s feeling lazy she can be found curled up watching Netflix. She’s currently learning Polish, and her battle with that mystifying language has given her huge empathy for anyone struggling to learn English. Find out more about her work in her portfolio.

anus — butt

arse — butt

arsehole — butt

ass — butt

ass-hat — idiot

ass-jabber — homosexual

ass-pirate — homosexual

assbag — idiot

assbandit — homosexual

assbanger — homosexual

assbite — idiot

assclown — butt

asscock — idiot

asscracker — butt

asses — butts

assface — butt

assfuck — rear-loving

assfucker — homosexual

assgoblin — homosexual

asshat — butt

asshead — idiot

asshole — jerk

asshopper — homosexual

assjacker — homosexual

asslick — idiot

asslicker — Buttlicker

assmonkey — idiot

assmunch — idiot

assmuncher — butt

assnigger — Racial Slur

asspirate — homosexual

assshit — idiot

assshole — butt

asssucker — idiot

asswad — butt

asswipe — butt

axwound — female genitalia

bampot — idiot

bastard — illegitimate child

beaner — Mexican

bitch — female dog

bitchass — idiot

bitches — female dogs

bitchtits — homosexual

bitchy — mean

blow job — sexual act

blowjob — sexual act

bollocks — male genitalia

bollox — male genitalia

boner — erection

brotherfucker — homosexual

bullshit — poop

bumblefuck — homosexual

butt plug — cork

butt-pirate — homosexual

buttfucka — homosexual

buttfucker — homosexual

camel toe — female genitalia

carpetmuncher — homosexual

chesticle — Breast

chinc — Chinese

chink — asian

choad — male genitalia

chode — small penis

clit — female genitals

clitface — idiot

clitfuck — sexual act

clusterfuck — mess up

cock — penis

cockass — Jerk

cockbite — idiot

cockburger — idiot

cockface — idiot

cockfucker — idiot

cockhead — idiot

cockjockey — homosexual

cockknoker — homosexual

cockmaster — homosexual

cockmongler — homosexual

cockmongruel — homosexual

cockmonkey — idiot

cockmuncher — homosexual

cocknose — idiot

cocknugget — idiot

cockshit — idiot

cocksmith — homosexual

cocksmoke — homosexual

cocksmoker — homosexual

cocksniffer — homosexual

cocksucker — homosexual

cockwaffle — idiot

coochie — female genitalia

coochy — female genitalia

coon — African American

cooter — vagina

cracker — Caucasian

cum — semen

cumbubble — idiot

cumdumpster — prostitute

cumguzzler — homosexual

cumjockey — homosexual

cumslut — dirty girl

cumtart — idiot

cunnie — female genitalia

cunnilingus — sexual act

cunt — vagina

cuntass — idiot

cuntface — idiot

cunthole — female genitalia

cuntlicker — homosexual

cuntrag — idiot

cuntslut — idiot

dago — Italian

damn — darn

deggo — Italian

dick — penis

dick-sneeze — orgasm

dickbag — idiot

dickbeaters — Hands

dickface — idiot

dickfuck — idiot

dickfucker — homosexual

dickhead — phallace face

dickhole — male genitalia

dickjuice — semen

dickmilk — sperm

dickmonger — homosexual

dicks — penises

dickslap — sexual act

dicksucker — homosexual

dicksucking — sexual act

dicktickler — homosexual

dickwad — idiot

dickweasel — idiot

dickweed — idiot

dickwod — idiot

dike — homosexual

dildo — sexual toy

dipshit — idiot

doochbag — idiot

dookie — poop

douche — female hygene product

douche-fag — idiot

douchebag — female hygene accessory

douchewaffle — homosexual

dumass — idiot

dumb ass — idiot

dumbass — idiot

dumbfuck — idiot

dumbshit — idiot

dumshit — idiot

dyke — homosexual

fag — homosexual

fagbag — homosexual

fagfucker — homosexual

faggit — homosexual

faggot — homosexual

faggotcock — homosexual

fagtard — homosexual idiot

fatass — a fat person

fellatio — sexual act

feltch — sexual act

flamer — homosexual

fuck — fornicate

fuckass — idiot

fuckbag — idiot

fuckboy — idiot

fuckbrain — idiot

fuckbutt — butt

fuckbutter — Sexual fluids

fucked — had intercourse

fucker — fornicator

fuckersucker — idiot

fuckface — idiot

fuckhead — butt

fuckhole — jerk

fuckin — sexual act

fucking — freaking

fucknut — idiot

fucknutt — idiot

fuckoff — go away

fucks — sexual act

fuckstick — male genitalia

fucktard — Moron

fucktart — idiot

fuckup — idiot

fuckwad — idiot

fuckwit — dummy

fuckwitt — idiot

fudgepacker — homosexual

gay — homosexual

gayass — butt

gaybob — homosexual

gaydo — homosexual

gayfuck — homosexual

gayfuckist — homosexual

gaylord — homosexual

gaytard — homosexual

gaywad — homosexual

goddamn — goshdarn

goddamnit — goshdarnit

gooch — female genitalia

gook — Chinese

gringo — foreigner

guido — italian

handjob — sexual act

hard on — erection

heeb — Jewish Person

hell — heck

ho — woman

hoe — Woman

homo — homosexual

homodumbshit — idiot

honkey — white person

humping — sexual act

jackass — idiot

jagoff — idiot

jap — japanesse person

jerk off — masturbate

jerkass — idiot

jigaboo — African American

jizz — Semen

jungle bunny — african american

junglebunny — african american

kike — Jewish Person

kooch — female genitalia

kootch — female genitalia

kraut — german

kunt — female genitalia

kyke — Jewish person

lameass — loser

lardass — overweight individual

lesbian — homosexual

lesbo — homosexual

lezzie — homosexual

mcfagget — homosexual

mick — irish

minge — female genitalia

mothafucka — Jerk

mothafuckin’ — mother loving

motherfucker — mother lover

motherfucking — fornicating with mother

muff — female genitalia

muffdiver — homosexual

munging — sexual act

negro — african american

nigaboo — African American

nigga — african american

nigger — african american

niggers — African Americans

niglet — african american child

nut sack — male genitalia

nutsack — male genitalia

paki — pakistanien

panooch — femail genitalia

pecker — Penis

peckerhead — idiot

penis — male genitalia

penisbanger — homosexual

penisfucker — homosexual

penispuffer — homosexual

piss — urinate

pissed — urinated

pissed off — angry

pissflaps — female genitalia

polesmoker — homosexual

pollock — polish person

poon — female genitals

poonani — female genitalia

poonany — vagina

poontang — female genitalia

porch monkey — african american

porchmonkey — African American

prick — penis

punanny — female genitalia

punta — female dog

pussies — Female Genitalias

pussy — female reproductive organ

pussylicking — sexual act

puto — idiot

queef — vaginal fart.

queer — homosexual

queerbait — homosexual

queerhole — homosexual

renob — erection

rimjob — dirty sexual act

ruski — Russian

sand nigger — middle eastern

sandnigger — middle eastern

schlong — male genitalia

scrote — male genitalia

shit — poop

shitass — idiot

shitbag — idiot

shitbagger — idiot

shitbrains — idiot

shitbreath — Bad Breath

shitcanned — Fired

shitcunt — idiot

shitdick — idiot

shitface — pooface

shitfaced — Drunk

shithead — jerk

shithole — idiot

shithouse — bathroom

shitspitter — butt

shitstain — poop

shitter — defecator

shittiest — worst

shitting — pooping

shitty — bad

shiz — poop

shiznit — poop

skank — dirty girl

skeet — semen

skullfuck — sexual act

slut — sexually popular woman

slutbag — sexually popular woman

smeg — poop

snatch — female genitalia

spic — mexican

spick — mexican american

splooge — ejaculate

spook — White person

suckass — idiot

tard — mentally challenged

testicle — male genitalia

thundercunt — idiot

tit — breast

titfuck — sexual act

tits — breasts

tittyfuck — sexual act

twat — female genitals

twatlips — idiot

twats — vaginas

twatwaffle — homosexual

unclefucker — homosexual

va-j-j — female genitalia

vag — femail genitalia

vagina — female genitalia

vajayjay — female genitalia

vjayjay — female genitalia

wank — sexual act

wankjob — sexual act

wetback — Mexican

whore — hussy

whorebag — idiot

whoreface — idiot

wop — Italian

Disclaimer: This article contains lots of bad words. If you don’t want to read bad words, don’t click on an article about swearing.

I haven’t included racist or homophobic language. You should swear at someone because they are behaving badly, not because of how they were born.

Note: Don’t use these phrases in your job interviews and Cambridge exams. And be careful when using them on a first date.

So you are learning English. The language of Shakespeare. Of Dickens. Of Wordsworth and James Joyce. You love its beauty and majesty and you never tire of its power and precision. English sparks joy.

But sometimes you just have to scream at someone. Sometimes your computer freezes and you lose 2 hours of work. Sometimes your car won’t start and you’re already late.

That’s when you want to swear.

When I’m teaching my classes I almost never swear. I try to be a ‘good model’ of English so that students can safely mimic me. But when the lesson is over – I start swearing like a sailor.

When to Swear

• When you are frustrated.
• When something unexpected happens.
• When you want to make a sentence funnier.
• When today ends with the letter Y.

The 10 Best English Swear Words

1. Fucking

The cornerstone of all swearing.

Basically you can and should use it liberally before nouns and adjectives.

• He’s so fucking stupid!
• It’s too fucking cold in here!
  

And before verbs.

• Fucking slow down!
• Can you please fucking shut up?
• Could you fucking pass the fucking salt?

And before other swear words.

• Where the fucking fuck is my fucking phone?

2. Dick

Synonyms: cock, prick, knob, tool (and a million others)

A dick is a penis. Obviously calling someone a penis has a negative meaning.

Why do you like Brian? He’s a total dick.

I mostly use it in the phrase ‘don’t be a dick’. It means ‘please behave with more class and dignity, like Anthony Hopkins in The Remains of the Day’.

The first time I told my girlfriend she was ‘being a dick’ she was NOT happy. But the next day she said, ‘you know what? I was being a dick. I’m truly, truly sorry.’

That’s how I remember it, anyway.

3. Shit

There’s shit in the sense of ‘this movie is shit‘, which means ‘really bad’. And there’s ‘a shit’ which is just like ‘a dick’ in part 2.

Note: If you want to get creative you can often add the suffix head to these curse words. ‘He’s a shithead’. ‘Trump is such a dickhead.’

But my favourite version is ‘little shit’, which is how I show affection to my cat.

My cat has his own schedule, and he doesn’t give a shit what I am doing. He wants to go outside at 3AM and be let back in one microsecond before I fall back asleep. He’s extremely demanding and everything has to be done just how he likes it. Otherwise he wails his fucking head off, scratches at doors – whatever it takes. But you can’t stay mad at him. He’s adorable!

Guess what that little shit did? He waited until I got in the bath to start demanding his dinner! He does it on purpose!

4. Talking Shit

Movies are shit, someone is a shit, and people talk shit. That means saying stupid or impossible things.

• Francis says we swallow 10 spiders in our sleep.
• As always, Francis is talking shit. That’s not true.

My favourite is to look someone in the eye and say ‘don’t talk shit’. The important thing is to put a space/pause between each word. Make it three sentences!

5. Jesus

Most swearing is based on religion. But if God didn’t want us to swear, why did he make it so cool?

You can say ‘Jesus’ almost any time anything happens. Your cat vomits on your new socks? Jesus! Your neighbour has a new haircut that makes him look like a fucking serial killer? Jesus! You drop a knife and it nearly hits your toe? Jesus!

The best thing about the word ‘Jesus’ is that it’s so modular. Modular means you can easily add bits to it. So if you want extra emphasis you go:

Jesus Christ!

That’s literally twice as powerful as just saying ‘Jesus’.

But there’s more. One of the two great American inventions of the 20th century was stuffed crust pizza. The other was adding the letter H to Jesus’s name.

Jesus H. Christ!

Try it! It’s very satisfying.

If you want to get really creative with this one, you can try this:

Christ on a bike!

Yes, it’s real. People say it. Especially me.

6. Jesus Wept

We haven’t totally finished the Jesus theme. That’s because I feel ‘Jesus wept’ deserves its own entry.

‘Jesus wept’ is the shortest sentence in The Bible, and in the 1990s people started using it to express disappointment and/or annoyance. You have to put some negative energy into your voice as you say it.

Imagine your drunk boyfriend is trying to unlock the front door but he can’t get the key in the lock. You’re not angry enough to shout ‘stop dicking around!’ but you do want to say something. That’s where ‘Jesus wept’ comes in.

Or you’re watching your favourite football team and after 10 minutes they are 2-0 down and miss a penalty. You put your head in your hands and go ‘Jesus wept‘.

Because it’s a line from The Bible it’s much safer to use in public than those in section 5. If you say it in school and you get in trouble, you can say that you were just memorising scripture.

7. Holy Fuck

Take your basic ‘farmer English’ and add a hint of religious mysticism and you get ‘Holy Fuck’. It feels so smooth coming out of your mouth. Use it to express surprise and amazement.

• Holy fuck! That bumblebee is the size of a tennis ball!
• Holy fuck! That bitch is wearing a white dress to MY wedding!
• Holy fuck! I just noticed three spelling mistakes in my resume!
• Holy fuck! The guy who wrote Chernobyl also wrote The Hangover 2!

8. God Damn It

This one is pretty mild these days (although technically you’ll go to hell if you use it), but it remains deeply satisfying to say. Use it when you’re frustrated.

• Ah god damn it! This machine is broken again!
• Who’s phoning me during dinner? God damn it!

It’s another one with fun variations.

• Damn it all to hell!
• Fuck this goddamnedcocksucking game. Seriously. Fuck it sideways.

9. Fuckwit

A fuckwit is an idiot. A moron. An imbecile.

But it’s got the word ‘fuck’ in it so it’s much stronger than all of those.

You have to WARM IT UP before you TURN IT ON you absolute FUCKWIT.

10. Sod It

This is a very British way of saying ‘I’ve had enough of this’ or ‘I don’t want to continue’.

It’s too hot to do any work. Sod it, let’s go to the pub.

People often say ‘sod this’ or ‘sod that’.

As you know, ‘this‘ is used for things that are physically or emotionally close to you.

• We’ve nearly finished this IKEA wardrobe but there’s a piece of wood and 14 screws left over. I think we’ve made a big mistake.
• Sod this. Let’s call a pizza and watch TV.

And ‘that‘ is used for things that are physically or emotionally DISTANT.

• My boss wants me to work on Saturday.
• Sod that! Come to the lake with me and we’ll eat corn on the cob smothered in butter.

Let’s Practice Swearing

Who is the most famous writer in English?

1. William Fucking Shakespeare.

2. Charles ‘The Dick’ Dickens.

You, a cat, are having a nice relaxing day. Suddenly, this happens.

1. Haha, what an entertaining prank. You got me.

2. Oh you little shit! Do that again and I will fucking murder you.

Come on, bro! Let your emotions out! Tell us how you really feel!

What did Karl (the guy on the right) say?

1. «The best topping for a pizza is pineapple.»

2. «Empire Strikes Back is the best Star Wars movie.»

3. «The 1980s was the best decade for music.»

The other two sentences are 100% accurate (so if he said them, he wouldn’t have been talking shit).

Pineapple is absolutely fucking disgusting. If I went on a date with Jennifer Lawrence and she ordered a Hawaiian pizza I would walk out.

Why is Eggsy so upset?

1. He’s watching episode 4 of the hit TV show Chernobyl.

2. He’s watching Peppa Pig.

3. He just got his exam results from Cambridge.

Nobody would ever react badly to watching Peppa Pig, and Eggsy’s exam results were great because he prepared by taking online courses here at EFL Academy.

The correct answer is that he’s watching Chernobyl. It’s amazing, but holy fuck, it’s hard to watch.

All 4 questions completed!

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Let’s Practice Swearing

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Sweary Abbreviations, Acronyms, and Initialisms

FFS – For fuck’s sake. Great for showing disbelief. Trump said what?! Oh, FFS.

WTF – What the fuck? Multi-purpose. WTF were you doing in a hotel with our marriage counselor?

BS – Bullshit. Used when something is untrue. That’s BS! I never went to The Plaza Inn with Simon last night!

STFU – Shut the fuck up.

GTFO – Get the fuck out.

Fubar – Fucked up beyond all recognition. Used to describe a situation that has gone VERY wrong.

BFD – Big fucking deal. Who cares?

A Partial List of English Swear Words

Quite Mild

Arse – Means ‘bottom’. Arse is British English and ass is American. She has a face like a slapped arse.

Asshat – A moron. An idiot. Jack is, and always will be, a prize asshat. If you marry him I shall never speak to you again.

Bugger – Basically a much milder version of ‘fuck’. You want me to work on Saturday? Bugger that!

Cow – A rude name for a woman. Drive on the left you silly cow!

Damn – Means all kinds of things, from ‘wow!’ to ‘that is bad news’. Here’s a picture of my younger sister. / Damn! She’s hot!  / And here’s a picture of her husband. / Damn.

Git – Someone you don’t like. That Boris Johnson is a bit of a git, isn’t he? / Clean your room you lazy git!

A Bit Harsh

Arsehole – A particular part of a bottom. It’s ruder than ‘arse’ because holes are generally rude.

Balls – Testicles. Generally used to mean something bad. We put him in charge of the Lisbon project and he totally ballsed it up. He doesn’t have the balls to make hard decisions.

Bitch – Like cow, but cowier.

Bollocks – A very British way of saying ‘bullshit’.

Bullshit – An American way of saying ‘bollocks’.

Pissed – angry or drunk. I got pissed last night, and when I got home my wife was really pissed.

Son of a bitch – Child of a cow. That son of a bitch has parked in my space again! I’ll rip his head off!

Tits – Boobs. Lol.

Strong

Bastard – A bad dude.

Bellend – Another way to say ‘dick’.

Cocksucker – Someone who gives blowjobs to men. Still considered offensive even though more than half of the population do it. Not a word I ever use, but it has lots of strong harsh syllables in it, so you can really spit it in someone’s face.

Fanny – In the UK, a lady’s special area (rude). In the USA, a bottom (not that rude).

Pussy/Snatch/Twat/Minge/Beaver – Lady’s special area again. “When you’re a star you can just grab ’em by the pussy.” The 45th President of the USA.

Slag/Slut/Whore – A woman who sleeps with lots of men. There’s no equivalent for a man who sleeps with lots of women.

Wanker – A man who pleasures himself sexually. The implication is that he’s a loser who can’t get a girlfriend.

Very Toxic

Cunt – Lady bits. For some reason this version is considered much stronger than the other variants. Calling someone a cunt is a good way to start a fight.

Motherfucker – This one is still considered provocative even though it’s used 400 times in every Hollywood movie.