Is who a preposition word

What You Really Need to Know About ‘Who’ and ‘Whom’

Trust your instincts. The choice between who and whom can sometimes be confusing, and this has always been the case. But English is extremely flexible, and actual usage doesn’t always follow the strict rules of grammar. Our ears are our guides, and there are many constructions (like «Whom did you speak to?» vs. «Who did you speak to?») in which whom may be technically correct but still feel fussy or unnatural. In these cases, it is perfectly standard to use who.

A Detailed Guide for Hardcore Grammar Fans

Whom is both simple and complicated. It is simple in that it is simply the objective case of who, which means that it’s the form of who that is in the object position in a sentence. What exactly constitutes the object position in a sentence is where things get complicated.

An object, in grammatical terms, is a noun or noun equivalent (such as a pronoun, gerund, or clause) that receives the action of a verb or that completes the meaning of a preposition—so, for example, sandwich in «They bought a sandwich»; it in «My dog ate it»; apologizing in «an appropriate time for apologizing»; and that it was true in «I was afraid that it was true.»

Who is a pronoun, which means that it’s used instead of a noun or noun phrase to refer to a noun/noun phrase that has already been mentioned or that does not need to be named specifically. Whom replaces who in spots where that word would receive the action of the verb or complete the meaning of a preposition.

‘Who’ vs ‘Whom’ Examples

Let’s look at some of the grammatical places who tends to appear and see whether whom ought to go there instead.

Who often functions as an interrogative pronoun, which means that it introduces questions that have nouns as the answer:

Who told my dog about that sandwich?

Who should my dog apologize to?

Both of these sentences sound natural with who, but if we want to know whether whom is the grammarian’s choice in either of them, we’ll have to determine if each who is in the object position. With questions, the easiest way to do this is to reimagine the question as a statement. «Who told my dog about that sandwich?» becomes «X told my dog about that sandwich,» with «X» standing for the unknown divulger of sandwich existence. «X» is the subject of the verb told, since «X» has done the telling, so who is indeed correct.

Reimagining the second question as a statement, «Who should my dog apologize to?» becomes «My dog should apologize to X.» «X» is the object of the preposition to, so who should technically be whom: «Whom should my dog apologize to?» (If you don’t like the terminal preposition—which is ancient and perfectly grammatical—you may prefer «To whom should my dog apologize?») We’ll highlight the preferred versions:

Whom should my dog apologize to?

OR

To whom should my dog apologize?

Relative Pronouns and Subordinate Clauses

Who and whom also frequently function as relative pronouns, which means that they refer to a noun or noun phrase that was mentioned earlier:

The person who told my dog about the sandwich was unhelpful.

The sandwich’s owner, who my dog apologized to, requires a replacement sandwich.

Again, some analysis is required to determine if who here is in the object position and should therefore technically be whom. Relative pronouns introduce subordinate clauses, a subordinate clause being a group of words that has a subject and predicate but that doesn’t by itself form a complete sentence. In the sentences above, the subordinate clauses are «who told my dog about the sandwich» and «who my dog apologized to.» To determine whether whom is the preferred pronoun, we need to figure out if the noun or noun phrase that who refers to is in the object position or not. We’ll replace who with the noun/noun phrase it refers to, and split the whole thing into two sentences for clarity:

The person told my dog about the sandwich.

The person was unhelpful.

In «The person who told my dog about the sandwich was unhelpful,» who refers to «the person,» which is the subject of both predicates: «told my dog about the sandwich» and «was unhelpful.» Therefore, who is indeed the preferred choice.

Now we’ll look at the second relative pronoun example, replacing who with the noun/noun phrase it refers to, again splitting the original into two sentences:

The sandwich’s owner requires a replacement sandwich.

The sandwich’s owner my dog apologized to.

To make that second one grammatical, we have to do some rearranging, as we did with the questions:

My dog apologized to the sandwich’s owner.

In «The sandwich’s owner, who my dog apologized to, requires a replacement sandwich,» the subject of the verb apologized is «my dog»; who is actually the object of the preposition to, which means that whom is the preferred pronoun here:

The sandwich’s owner, whom my dog apologized to, requires a replacement sandwich.

More Tricky Examples

These can be tricky so we’ll analyze a few more examples. Plus, this sandwich-dog drama goes deeper.

According to my cat, who was among those witness to the sandwich consumption, the sandwich appeared to have been abandoned.

Is who here correct? Yes: because who, while referring to «my cat,» is the subject of the predicate «was among those witness to the sandwich consumption.»

My cat, who I was eager to believe, has been known to fib.

How about here? In this case, who refers again to «my cat,» but is the object of the verb believe: «I was eager to believe my cat.» Therefore the sentence should technically in fact be:

My cat, whom I was eager to believe, has been known to fib.

Sometimes the who/whom is quite buried, syntactically speaking, making analysis especially difficult. See here:

I know that who is on the cat’s good side always matters in such cases.

Here, we have the conjunction that introducing a subordinate clause headed by the pronoun who. The first part of our analysis is determining the subject and predicate of the entire sentence. The subject is I; the predicate is everything else. Know is the main verb, and everything else is actually the object of that verb: «I know x.»

Now that we know much, we can focus on what who is doing in that very long subordinate clause:

Who is on the cat’s good side always matters in such cases.

Who here is a relative pronoun referring to an understood noun/noun phrase along the lines of «which person/creature.» Since the sentence is still quite complex, we’ll simplify again, finding the main subject and predicate. Stripped down to its most essential meaning, the sentence can be understood as «Who (aka, which creature) always matters,» which tells us that the subject is the entire bit «Who is on the cat’s good side,» and the predicate is «always matters in such cases.»

Note, though, that the subject is itself a clause with its own subject and predicate: «Who is on the cat’s good side.» Who is the subject of the verb is: «X is on the cat’s good side.» This means that our original sentence is indeed technically correct, despite the fact that who appears in what looks like an object position, after the verb know:

I know that who is on the cat’s good side always matters in such cases.

After all that, surely no one can claim that keeping who and whom in their prescribed places is easy to do. In fact, it’s about as easy as keeping a dog from eating an unguarded, and ostensibly abandoned, sandwich.

Want More Commonly Confused Words?

• Who’s vs. Whose
• Soever, Whomsoever, and Wheresoever
• Than I vs. Than Me

Who and whom are two words that sound very much alike. However, that similarity just makes when to use who vs. whom all the more confusing.

Main Who vs. Whom Takeaways:

• Who and whom are both pronouns.
• When you’re referring to the subject of the sentence, use who.
• Confirm you’re using the correct pronoun by replacing who with she/he/they.
• When your’re referring to the object, use whom.
• Confirm you’re using the correct pronoun by replacing whom with her/him/them.
• Sometimes you may have to break the who or whom rule to make your content more readable. Or, to prevent awkward and unnatural phrasing.

In this super easy guide, we’ll show you a few simple tricks to remember the difference and use both pronouns like a pro, every time. Also, you’ll see both in action with tons of who vs. whom examples. Don’t forget to test your skills with our quick quiz at the end of this article.

How Do You Use Whom?

You should use whom to refer to the object of a verb or a preposition. Here’s a quick and easy trick to be sure whom is the correct pronoun to use: Replace whom with him or her. If the sentence still makes sentence and is grammatically correct, thenyou know whom is the correct choice.

On the other hand, if he or she sounds better, then you should use who instead. You can remember this trick by associating the “m” in him with the “m” in whom. Another clue is to look for a preposition. For example, whom usually follows a preposition.

How Do You Use Whom in a Sentence?

Here are examples of how to use whom in a sentence:

Remember: The “m” in him goes with the “m” in whom. If you can answer the question with him, then use whom.

What’s the Difference Between Who’s and Whom?

Aside from spelling, who’s and whom have different functions in a sentence. To begin with, who’s is a contraction. Meaning, it’s a two-word term joined together by an apostrophe. It could mean who is or who has. On the other hand, whom is a pronoun and often acts as the object of a verb or preposition.

Here are some examples of how to use who’s in a sentence:

Who vs. Whom: They/Them?

Just like you can use he/him to confirm whether to use who/whom, you can also use they/them. This is because who and whom can represent singular pronouns like he and him as well as plural pronouns like they and them. For plural pronouns, replace who with they. If the sentence is still grammatically correct, then you know that who is the correct pronoun. Conversely, if them sounds better, then you know that whom is the correct pronoun to use.

Remember: If you can replace who or whom with he/she/they, then you should be using who.

Who vs. Whom Example Sentences?

1. Is Many of Whom Correct?

Yes, the phrase many of whomis correct to use whom instead of who. This is because you should use whom to refer to object of a verb or preposition. Since of is a preposition, whomis the correct pronoun to follow it. Another way you can confirm if whom is correct is to replace it with another pronoun like him, her, or them. If the sentence is still grammatically correct, then whom is correct.

2. Who or Whom I Worked With?

The ideal answer is with whom I worked. Whom goes with the object of the verb or preposition in a sentence. Since this phrase contains the preposition with, the most correct way to craft this sentence is using whom. Test if whomis correct by replacing it with him. Does the sentence still make sense? Then whom is the best pronoun to use.

3. Who I Live With or Whom I Live With?

Whom I live with or with whom I live are the correct ways to phrase this. The rule is that who refers to the subject of the sentence while whom refers to object of the verb and or the preposition. Here, we have the preposition with and the verb live. Both of these refer to the person you live with, not the subject of the sentence (I). For this reason, whom is the correct pronoun. Confirm this by rewriting the sentence to use the pronouns him/her/them. If the sentence is still correct, then you know that whom is the correct choice.

4. Who I Admire or Whom I Admire?

Here, the correct answer is whom I admire.This is because we use whom to refer to the object of a preposition or verb. In this phrase, there is no preposition. However, there is a verb: admire. Whom is the object of this verb. In other words, whom receives the action of you admiring. You can confirm that whom is correct because you can replace it with him and the sentence is still grammatically correct.

5. Who I Hate or Whom I Hate?

For this example, whom I hate is the correct phrasing. This is because whom usually refers to the object of a preposition or a verb. We don’t have a preposition in this phrase. But, we do have the verb hate. What’s more, whom is receiving the action of hate. This makes whom the object of the hate.

Since whom is used for the object of a verb, we know that whom is the correct choice here. Confirm this by replacing whom with her or him. If the sentence is still grammatically correct, then whom is the right pronoun to use. If not, then you should use who.

6. Who or Whom Did You See?

Even though you often hear who did you see in everyday conversations, the most grammatically correct answer is whom did you see. Whom refers to the object of the preposition or verb in a sentence. This sentence doesn’t have a preposition, but it does have a verb: see. What’s more, this verb refers to the person you saw (the object), and not you (the subject).

Usually, who refers to the subject. Since whom refers to the object of a verb, it’s the correct pronoun to use in this sentence. One way to confirm this is to rewrite the sentence using him or her. If the sentence is still correct, then you confirm that whom is the correct pronoun.

7. Who or Whom I’ve Never met?

The correct phrasing here is whom I’ve never met. The reason is that whom typically refers to the object of a sentence’s preposition or verb. In other words, whom receives the action.

On the other hand, who usually refers to the subject. This phrase doesn’t feature a preposition, but it does have the verbs have and met. Have is a linking verb, so it’s not showing any action.

However, met is an action verb and is acting on whom. As a result, whom receives the action. The verb met refers to the object (whom) and not the subject (I). Therefore, we know that whom is the correct pronoun. Verify this by rewriting the sentence to substitute whom with she or he.

8. Who We Miss or Whom We Miss?

Whom we miss is correct, not who we miss. Who refers to the subject whilewhom refers to the object of the preposition or verb. We is the subject.

However, the verb miss doesn’t refer to the subject we. Instead, it refers to the person you miss. This means that the person you miss is an object of the verb miss. For this reason, whom is the correct pronoun to refer to the person you miss.

Test this by rewriting the sentences to replace whom with the pronouns him, her, or they. Is the sentence still grammatically correct? If it is, then the correct answer is whom. If it’s not, then you should use who instead.

9. Who or Whom I Love so Much?

The correct way to phrase this whom I love so much,not who I love so much. We know that whom is correct because this pronoun refers to the object of a preposition or verb. We may not have a preposition, but we have the verb love. This verb refers to the person being loved (object), and not the I, or the person doing the loving (subject).

Since who refers to the subject while whom refers to the object of the verb, whom is correct. Check that whom is the correct pronoun by rewriting the sentence with him,her, or them. If the sentence is still grammatically correct with one of these other pronouns, then you know whom is correct. However, if he, she, or they fit better, then you know who is correct.

10. Who or Whom Wants Ice Cream?

Who wants ice cream is the correct way to phrase this sentence. The best way to confirm that who is the correct pronoun is to replace it with he/she/they. Does the sentence still make sense? Is it still grammatically correct? If yes, then you know who is correct. If no, then you should use whom.

What’s more, use who to refer to the subject of the sentence. Another way we know that who wants ice cream is correct option is because the subject of the sentence is who.

11. Is it “Who to Ask” or “Whom to Ask”?

The grammatically correct way to phrase this is whom to ask. The phrase to ask really means should I ask. Whenever we need a pronoun that refers to the subject, we use who.

However, when we need one that refers to the object of a preposition or a verb, we use whom. Here, the implied verb shouldrefers to implied subject I. So, now we need a pronoun to go with the verb ask.

Sincewhom refers to the object of the verb and not the subject, we know that whom is the correct pronoun. An easy way to confirm this is to rephrase the sentence using him/her/them. These work as substitutes for whom while he/she/they work for who.

12. Who to Follow or Whom to Follow?

Although the majority of people would probably say who, whom to follow is correct. This is because the phrase to follow actually means should I follow. Therefore, the implied verb should refers to implied subject I.

Since we use who to refer to the subject, we can rule out who. Instead, we use whom to refer to the object of the preposition or verb. Specifically, we need an object for the verb follow. This is why whom is the correct answer.

Easily verify this is by rephrasing the sentence using him/her/them. You can use these pronouns as substitutes for whom and the existence will remain correct. Similarly use he/she/they for who.

13. Who Should you Invite to the Party?

Even though most people would use who, the grammatically correct way to phrase this sentence is Whom should you invite to the party. The trick to know with certainty that the answer is whom is to rephrase the sentence using him/her/them. This is because we use whom to refer to the object of a preposition or verb, and these pronouns can substitute whom.

Conversely, we use who to refer to the subject of the sentence, and he/she/they can substitute who. In this example, the verb shouldrefers to the subject you. However, we need an object for the verb invite. Therefore, whom is the best fit.

Whom: Death of a Pronoun

Many modern grammarians consider whomto be a dying word.

It wouldn’t be the first pronoun to fall out of use, either. Others that have gone before it include thy, thine, ye, and thee. Although they may still show up in religious writing, they’ve fallen out of common use.

Although whom and whomever still have a place in formal writing, they are no longer common in spoken English. Many publications have also ceased using them. Instead, they opt to rephrase sentences to include easier-to-digest pronouns such as him, her, and them.

Who vs. Whom Recap

Who and whom are both pronouns. Depending on your sentence structure, you can easily determine which one to choose.

Ask yourself the following:

• Are you referring to the subject of the sentence? If so, use the pronoun who.
• Is the object of the sentence what you’re referring to? If so, use the pronoun whom.

Here’s a trick that you can use if you get stuck. When deciding on whom vs. who, think of it as him vs he.

• If you can answer the question with “he,” you’ll want to use who—no “m” at the end!
• However, if you can answer the query with “him,” you’ll want to use whom. They both have an “m” at the end!

But wait! What if you’re talking about a lady instead of a gentleman? No worries—we only used “he” or “him” because it makes it easier to highlight the “m” connection. While “whom“or“him” is a quick and memorable mnemonic device, the same idea applies to “she” or “her.”

• If you can answer the question with “she,” you’ll want to use who.
• On the other hand, if the answer to the question is “her,” you’ll want to use whom.

Ready to Dominate This Who vs. Whom Quiz?

Read More: ??‍♀️ Whoever vs. Whomever: The Easiest Guide on When to use Which Pronoun

Your question is an interesting one, and I am not surprised it is still floating around.

CGel can reasonably treat the who used in this type of context as a relative pronoun. It would involve something like understanding an unstated «..is who I am». That is a reasonable way of looking at it. Similarly, you can argue that it operates as an interrogative pronoun. In that case «who I am» is indirect (reported) speech, where we are to understand «..is who I am.» Either is defensible.

The first and obvious thing to say is that despite the now almost universal use of this fashionable idiom, dictionaries like Merriam Webster and the Cambridge English dictionaries do not seem to deal with it. I can tell you what it means (as if you didn’t know already). Whenever its first use may be, I doubt (from memory) whether it can be found before 1990, and possibly not before 2000.

Understanding the expression has very little to do with grammar. I mean that whoever its first users may have been, they are unlikely to have had a precise grammatical analysis in mind. And whoever they were who caught onto and spread it around the English speaking world were not interested in the grammar of it either. The fact that this saying is grammatically troubling is probably one reason for its catching on and spreading so widely. What it is, I have learned from internet searches, is a meme, and indeed a locus classicus of a meme. (By the way, locus classicus was probably a sort of meme of its own time (which ended during the second half of the 20th century). It was known then (in my younger years) as a Latin tag, widely used by academics barristers and senior civil servants till the 1980s, when the British civil service and other banned them from their publications and communications!)

The expression «it is who I am» is used more than once by Chris Tomlinson, who has a song which uses the meme over and over again:- https://babylonbee.com/news/im-chris-tomlin-its-who-i-am-16x—op-ed-by-chris-tomlin. Every verse consists of one repeated line as does the chorus (refrain)

I’m Chris Tomlinson, it’s who I am.

I shall not discuss the literary merits of this particular use of the meme. But one thing is obvious, and that is that there is nothing grammatically troubling about it. The use of the word ‘who‘ may be interrogative or relative. It tells you the identity of the speaker. Once I know your name is Chris Tomlinson, I know part of how to find you again. Though there are many other people of that name, it’s a good start. It gives me information about your identity.

Then there is a song by Chris Young called Who I Am with You. The song begins with an account of his making a bad start in life: a rolling stone, and in general not much good…. until he meets his beloved, when, in a rising climax of volume and pitch, he declares that

A better man is who I am with you.

This is different. This is linking his quality as a person to to his identity. But of course, if you ask the lucky girl who her boyfriend is, she is not going to answer: «He’s a better man», or «a good man». She certainly is not going to have much luck asking any of her friends whether they know where this better man she met up with on holiday might live. «Do you mean to tell us you didn’t find out who he was?» they might ask incredulously. So there is something queer about this locution.

The expression is often used to lay claim to particular personal qualities as their identity, or part of it. Someone can also use it to assert that some pursuit or avocation is so important to them as to be part of their identity: «musician/plumber/safe cracker/parent … is who I am». Without it I am nothing. Before the meme came along, people would say «Musician is what I am, or «A better person is what I am».

The meme is, in other words part of the contemporary identity culture. This meme asserts a person’s right to the things that are most important to them: things neither the state not society have the right to take away. This may involve personal qualities, possession, avocations or group memberships, national, ethnic, religious, gender and so on). Such assertions are, to be sure, likely to be challenged by most people at certain points: people are unlikely to find many accepting an assertion that a safe cracker, multi billionaire, serial killer or prime minister of the UK is «who they are». It raises questions, much debated, about whether a people can claim any kind of right to anything they lay claim to as «who I am». But this is not a matter of English Language Usage.

Aside from that, the expression (meme) succeeds by being arresting. And part of that arresting quality has to do with a (let me call it) grammatically stretched use of the relative or interrogative who to cover «what kind of».

• #1

Hello everyone, i have a doubt about what word to use in this sentence:
Whom i’m talking about or Who i’m talking about
Here it’s an object and not a subject so we should use whom , but usually people use who.
Is that a mistake ?

Moderator note: Multiple threads have been merged to create this one.

Last edited by a moderator: Dec 17, 2012

• #2

Not particularly a mistake.

Traditionally the object form is indeed whom. Over the passage of recent time, the use of whom has become less and less common, and most people tend to use who.

The sole exception that I can think of is after a preposition. Because putting a preposition at the beginning of the clause is a higher style of English, there’s more chance of that person using whom too.

«About who are you talking?» sounds terrible to us.

«About whom are you talking?» sounds nice and is considered by many to be «correct» English.

Most people would say «Who are you talking about?«, which sounds perfectly natural and is fine, although some people would complain (incorrectly) that one can’t use prepositions at the end of a sentence. This is by far the most common form.

The other one is «Whom are you talking about?» This is fine, though rare. It uses whom appropriately, although most people would choose who, since whom is becoming a rarely used form now.

• #3

Could anyone tell me which is correct, please?
I wonder who he takes after.
or
I wonder whom he takes after.

Thanks!

• #4

«I wonder who he takes after» is the correct one .

• #5

I personally would say «I wonder who he takes after» (Brit). But I suspect that some people, especially Americans, would say «I wonder whom he takes after». Strictly speaking, «whom» is governed by the preposition «after».

• #6

Bonjour

I have always had difficulties with the use of whom and who ,
in this example , I have opted for the first one , but I have some doubts

As-tu découvert avec qui Brigitte sort ?

Have you found out with whom Brigitte is going out ?

Have you found out who Brigitte is going out with ?Any help appreciated
thanks

• #7

Nobody except an eccentric Oxford professor of ancient languages would say Have you found out with whom Brigitte is going out ?

Stick to the other one: Have you found out who Brigitte is going out with?

• #8

Thanks Keith
Yes indeed the second one comes out more easily , but I have often made the effort of changing it because I thought it was the «proper way » (at least the way I was taught )

• #9

Yes, as Paul says people (in my experience) would never use this supposedly «proper» construction in speech.

I’d also add that it’s best to avoid a half-way house by having «whom» but also putting the preposition at the end, as in

Do you know whom Brigitte is going out with?

In other words, if you decide to use «whom» don’t put the preposition at the end, and similarly if you don’t put the preposition at the end then also use «whom» rather than «who»!

• #10

Hi,
I have doubts concerning the use of relative pronouns in English so here are some sentences, please tell me if they are all correct, thank you:

[…]

7) The man with whom I was this morning is my boss.
The man whom I was with this morning is my boss.
9) The man who I was with this morning is my boss.

Last edited by a moderator: May 13, 2010

• #11

«With whom» is rarely used and tends to sound formal—in this case it sounds wrong (we expect to hear a verb after the «was», like «The man with whom I was running…»). In general we separate the preposition and the relative pronoun. The problem with this is it sometimes forces us to end a sentence with a preposition. The best way to avoid this is to find a different way to form the sentence:

«The man whom Brigitte is going out with» <— sounds a bit ugly to have a preposition at the end of the sentence when you use the more proper «whom»
«The man who Brigitte is going out with» <— this is probably what you would hear—the prep. at the end is consistent in its relaxed tone with the technically incorrect «who» instead of «whom».
«The man with whom Brigitte is going out» <— tooformal, and it sounds silly to hear a formal construction with a very informal expression «going out»
«The man whom Brigitte is dating» <— better; the correct «whom» does not seem out of place in this case

• #12

The expression is «to be with someone.» Splitting the expression is unnatural, so sentence (7) sounds bad, although it is grammatically justifiable. Sentence (8) is correct… but because many English speakers do not distinguish carefully between who/whom, so you will more often hear sentence (9), although it is grammatically wrong for the purposes of e.g., a written examination of English grammar. You could also substitute «that» into sentence (8/9).

But frankly, I wouldn’t say any of those sentences. I would omit the relative pronoun entirely: The man I was with this morning is my boss. The man you saw me with this morning was my boss. etc.

• #13

Bonjour à toutes et tous,

Je suis en train de complèter un exercice de grammaire, où il faut ajouter des relatifs et j’ai un doute pour une phrase, si vous pouviez m’éclairer ce serait sympa :

Hans ______ he skied with all that week rarely went on holidays.

Je ne sais pas si je dois utiliser who ou whom, ici c’est un objet et non un sujet, donc ce devrait être whom, mais à cause de la préposition «with» mise à la fin, j’ai des doutes. Est ce que «who» peut aussi être utilisé ou non ? Hans who/whom he skied with all that week rarely went on holidays.

En outre, dans l’exercice, il est précisé que des virgules peuvent parfois être ajoutées à la phrase, mais j’ai du mal à savoir si cette proposition est une proposition relative restrictive ou appositive…Les deux me semblent possibles (car je ne sais pas si «who/whom he skied with all that week apporte une précision indispensable pour la compréhension de la phrase)… . Donc j’hésite aussi entre «Hans, who/whom he skied with all that week, rarely went on holidays.» et Hans who/whom he skied with all that week rarely went on holidays.»

Est ce que vous pensez que plusieurs propositions peuvent être correctes d’un point de vue grammatical ?

• #14

Welcome Lila!

Your version with commas is better, and ‘whom’ is correct … although as a native speaker I would be more likely to say «Hans, with whom he skied all that week, rarely went on holidays.»

However in everyday speech, many BE speakers would say «Hans, who he skied with …»

• #15

Merci beaucoup Annie ! J’avais effectivement pensé en premier lieu à la version «»Hans, with whom he skied» mais l’exercice ne me permettait pas de changer la place des mots, maheureusement. Merci encore pour l’explication !

• #16

Si la préposition précède le pronom relatif, celui-ci doit être whom. C’est toutefois un tour que l’on n’emploie plus vraiment, en particulier à l’oral. Si au contraire la préposition est reléguée à la fin de la phrase comme c’est presque systématiquement le cas aujourd’hui en anglais, il vaut mieux utiliser le pronom who, même si ce n’est pas « correct » grammaticalement. (J’ai mis des guillemets car il n’y a pas d’équivalent de l’Académie française en anglais et la notion de justesse est davantage basée sur l’usage que sur la règle.)

En bref :

Hans with whom he skied → grammaticalement correct, mais soutenu, voire littéraire
Hans whom he skied with → tour bâtard, à moitié « correct » (le pronom est correct mais la préposition n’est pas à la « bonne » place), de plus personne ne dirait cela → à éviter à tout prix, même si c’est la réponse qu’attend votre exercice !
Hans who he skied with → grammaticalement faux, mais tour naturel employé par tous les anglophones → c’est ce tour qu’il faut préférer

Last edited: Dec 17, 2012

• #17

«Have you found out who Brigitte is going out with» is completely incorrect!
Just because it’s commonly used doesn’t mean it’s grammatically correct.

Who should be used in the subject position in a sentence, while whom should be used in the object position. For example, Is jean going out with amelia? Yes, he is going out with her. With whom is he going out? with her (her = whom)

So the grammatically correct question would be as follows: Have you found out with whom Brigitte is going out?

Last edited: Mar 19, 2015

• #18

Shame on you, RitaRoland, for giving such misleading information to a foreign learner of English! We all know that you can’t end a sentence with a preposition. The correct form of that sentence is:

«Have you found out out with whom Brigitte is going?»

• #19

I wonder who he takes after.
I wonder whom he takes after.

Speaking grammatically it needs to be whom. As well, it is an incredibly common mistake but, I would not say that it is correct by that value.

• #20

First of all, you need to watch your language when talking to people on this forum. Secondly, when have I ever ended a sentence with a preposition?! «Going out» is a phrasal verb that can’t be separated in a sentence like the one about which we’re talking; it looks like you hadn’t know what a phrasal verb was before I told you! Thirdly, no, one shouldn’t end a sentence with a preposition, But are we even talking about a sentence? No, we are talking about a QUESTION not a sentence, and it’s grammatically correct to end a question with a preposition, let alone ending it with a phrasal verb such as «Going out», because one doesn’t even need to debate about it, since it’s absolutely fine to end a question with a phrasal verb. «Have you found out out with whom Brigitte is going?» is completely WRONG; «out out with» ?? Lol, are you serious? A nine year old wouldn’t put that nonsense in a sentence. So it’s you who needs to stop giving learners advice, since you obviously haven’t got what it takes to do so!
One more time, the correct form of this QUESTION would be: «Have you found out with whom is Brigitte going out?»

Last edited: Mar 20, 2015

• #21

@Rita

Rita, the reason for the smile he put is because, it was a joke. Ending a sentence with a preposition is perfectly fine in certain situations as the one you presented. Technically, a question is a sentence. Being grammatical yes, «Have you found out with whom…,» however, the conversation is talking about spoken/common use which is not always grammatical…

• #22

«Have you found out who Brigitte is going out with» is certainly not completely incorrect. For many people, it’s the only natural way that they would say this question. I don’t see the point of telling English language learners that it is ungrammatical.

• #23

The old prescriptive vs. descriptive debate will never end! I believe it would be wiser to avoid using the words «correct» or «incorrect» in this case. I’d rather put it this way. Using who with a dangling preposition is not following strict grammar rules. It is therefore not standard from a pure grammatical standpoint. On the other hand it is the most standard/common construction in modern English, even more so in speech.

According to the Oxford Dictionary:

According to formal grammar, who forms the subjective case and so should be used in subject position in a sentence, as in who decided this? The form whom, on the other hand, forms the objective case and so should be used in object position in a sentence, as in whom do you think we should support?; to whom do you wish to speak? Although there are some speakers who still use who and whom according to the rules of formal grammar as stated here, there are many more who rarely use whom at all; its use has retreated steadily and is now largely restricted to formal contexts. The normal practice in modern English is to use who instead of whom (and, where applicable, to put the preposition at the end of the sentence): who do you wish to speak to?; who do you think we should support? Such uses are today broadly accepted in standard English.

• #24

From a proper usage perspective here is the run-down…

In Garner’s Modern American Usage, in the LANGUAGE-CHANGE INDEX :
1. who as an object not following a preposition: Stage 4
2. who as an object following a preposition: Stage 2

Stages:
1) Rejected
2) Widely shunned
3) Widespread but…
4) Ubiquitous but…
5) Fully accepted

Of course, because this message is clearly informal speech, it’s a coin toss, despite the fact that it is widely shunned in proper usage.

Garner’s Modern American Usage pg. 861

What’s the difference between who and whom? These are two words that cause a lot of confusion, even for native-English speakers. So, it’s well worth taking a few minutes to know the difference between the two. Below, we’ve provided an easy guide on understanding the grammatical rules. We’ve also given some examples on how to use who and whom correctly. If you want to avoid mistakes in using who vs whom, read on.

Who vs whom: the grammar rules

The difference between who and whom explained

Easy tip to tell the difference between who and whom

How to use who and whom correctly: sentence examples (with an explanation)

Grammar Quiz: Who vs Whom in English language

The Advanced Who vs Whom

Grammar Quiz: Answer key

The question word what and who can act both as a subject or an object. Depending on that, the structure of the sentence will be different.

Questions to the subject with what and who

If «what» or «who» is the subject in the sentence, we don’t need an auxiliary verb. The main verb goes right after the question word:

What/Who + main verb + …?

Questions to the object with what and who

If what/who is the object in the sentence, we need an auxiliary verb.

What/Whom + auxiliary verb + subject + main verb + …?

We use «what» both as a subject and an object to make questions about things, abstract terms, but not about people.

We use the question word «who» when we ask questions about a person.

If the question word is a subject (= we can replace it with a personal pronoun in its basic form: Who did it? He did it. Who cares? She cares.), then we always say «who«.

But, if the question word is an object (= we can replace it with a personal pronoun in the objective case: Whom do you help? I help him.), we should say «whom» according to the official grammar rules. Especially, when the verb requires a preposition. However, whom is rarely used in modern spoken English, it sounds very formal.

If we sum up the above written, we’ll get a following table: