Funny one word texts

As cheesy as it is, do you want to know what the key to my heart is? A really good knock-knock joke! Yup, I’m that easy. But honestly, what’s wrong with that? Isn’t laughter supposed to be the best medicine?

In order to brighten your day and make you laugh out loud, I’d like to share my personal favorite flirty jokes, pick-up lines, one-liners, dirty pick-up lines and just some really funny jokes to crack you up because I’m sure you could use it.

Who doesn’t like a good joke? God knows they might come in handy with that guy/girl you’re swooning over!

So buckle up and make sure your mouth is empty because these might just make you spit your food out from laughing too hard.

There’s something here for just about anyone, so scroll on and I guarantee you’ll find a winner.

man and woman flirting outsideHow to be flirty over text and win over your crush through texting? Well, to be honest, it’s a lot easier job when you’ve got a good sense of humor. Lucky for you, I’ve got you covered.

Here are some cute, yet hilarious jokes that work as pretty good pick-up lines or sexting messages for her and him and will help you win the heart of that special someone! As much as they try to not laugh, they just won’t be able to resist these gems. These funny and flirty questions are definitely a way to go.

1. Is your dad Liam Neeson? Because I’m Taken with you.

2. Forget hydrogen, you’re my number one element.

3. Do you work for Domino’s? Cuz you a fine pizza ass.

4. Are you from Korea? Because you could be my Seoul mate.

5. Hi, I’m bisexual. I’d like to BUY you a drink…and then get sexual.

6. Are you a campfire? Cause you’re hot and I want s’more.

7. You still use Internet Explorer? You must like it nice and slow.

8. You smell like trash….. Can I take you out?

9. Hi, I’m writing a phone book, can I have your number?

10. I thought happiness started with an H. Why does mine start with U?woman standing on seashore while holding her white dress 11. Mami you are on fire…Le’me be the wind and make you even hotter.

12. I want to be your handbag so I never leave your side.

13. If kissing is spreading germs… How about we start an epidemic?

14. Which is easier? You getting into those tight jeans or me getting you out of them?

15. Excuse me, miss, can I have the time? I’d check my watch but I can’t take my eyes off you.

16. Hi, can I get your baseball jersey? (What?) You know your name and number!

17. Hey, can I follow you home? (What?) Oh sorry, it’s just my parents told me to follow my dreams.

18. Do you like Nintendo? Cuz “Wii” would look good together.

19. If my heart were to fly, your soul would be my airport.

20. You have repainted my life with colors that were previously unknown to me!

21. Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass!

22. When a penguin finds its mate they stay together for the rest of their lives. Will you be my penguin?

23. You wanna know who’s amazing and has the cutest smile ever? Read the first word again.

24. Do you know what’s on Valentine’s Day menu? Me-n-u.

See also: 300 Romantic Pick-Up Lines That Will Melt Her Heart

Corny Pick-Up Lines

man and woman walking along grass field while holding handsBe honest, corny jokes are just as funny as anything else, so why do they have such a bad rep? Here are some of the best pick-up lines that will change your mind and make you want to use one next time you’re trying to impress a boy/girl.

You won’t know if it’s love at first sight or just a damn good joke.

1. Boy: Girl, you remind me of a box of chocolates… Girl: Why? Boy: Cause I want to take your top off.

2. Boy: There are 20 letters in the alphabet right? Girl: (26, I think) Boy: I must have forgotten U R A Q T Girl: (You’re still missing one) Boy: I’ll give you the D later.

3. Boy: How does it feel? Girl: What do you mean? Boy: To be the only star in the sky.

4. Boy: Nickel for your thoughts? Girl: I thought it was a penny. Boy: I think your thoughts are worth more.

5. Boy: Are your parents bakers? Girl: Why? Boy: Cause they sure made you a cutie pie!

6. Boy: Girl, what’s your number? Girl: I have a boyfriend. Boy: I have a math test. Girl: What? Boy: Aren’t we talking about things we cheat on?

7. Boy: Will you read my palm? Girl: I don’t see anything. Boy: I didn’t expect you to because love is blind.man and woman siting on sofa chair while playing video games8. Boy: Have you ever been fishing? Girl: Why? Boy: Because I think we should hook up!

9. Boy: Holy shit (while looking at her). Girl What? Boy: Someone spilled gorgeous all over you!

10. Boy: Do you wanna be my SLUT? Girl: WHAT?! Boy: Do you even know what slut stands for? (S)weet (L)ittle (U)unforgettable (T)hing.

11. Boy: Oh my god it smells like up sexy in here. Girl: What’s up sexy? Boy: Oh nothing much, you?

12. Boy: So you going to be a butterfly all night? Girl: (puzzled look) Boy: You know, pretty to see but hard to catch!

13. Boy: Hi, I’m going to have to ask you to leave! Girl: Why? Boy: The sign says NO SMOKING….and you are definitely SMOKIN!

14. Boy: Let’s play fire trucks. I run my fingers up your legs and you say red light to stop. Girl: Red Light! Boy: Fire trucks don’t stop for red lights!

15. Boy: Have you been watching me? Girl: Why? Boy: Because I wanted you to fall for my smile as hard as I fell for you!

16. Boy: Do you play volleyball? Girl: Yeah, why? Boy: Because you look like you’re good on your knees!

17. Boy: Hi, is your name Google? Girl: No, Why? Boy: Because you have everything I’m looking for!

See also: 93 Coffee Pick Up Lines That Are Bound To Impress

Flirty Rejections

man and woman in black clothes staring at each otherAnd here are a few hilarious, flirty rejections just to make you laugh some more. If you get served one of these, you can’t even get mad, they’re that good.

Let’s hope your cheesy pick-up lines do a better job than these!

1. Boy: I’d really like to get into your pants. Girl: No thanks. There’s already one asshole in there!

2. Boy: Can you tell your breasts to stop staring at my eyes? Girl: How about you tell your boxers it’s rude to point!

3. Boy: Hey baby, what’s your sign? Girl: Do Not Enter!

4. Boy: Hi, my name is Milk. I’ll do your body good. Girl: Sorry, I’m lactose intolerant!

5. Boy: What are you doing later? Girl: Not You!

6. Boy: You know, unlike all these other guys, I can make you really happy Girl: Why? Are you leaving?

7. Boy: What’s it gonna take for you to come home with me? Girl: Chloroform!

See also: 150+ Good Morning Pick Up Lines To Choose From

Hilarious One-Liners

woman holding a fork with bite of cake

RELATED: 100 Best And Most Hilarious Jokes About Turning 30

These are priceless. Personally, a damn good one-liner can make me laugh harder than almost anything else. I just love movie characters who are the kings and queens of this department.

It’s not easy to pull them off, but man, are they good when delivered right! Let’s see if these measure up.

1. You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall… is in love with me.

2. Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

3. If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I’d have a galaxy in my hand.

4. Now, what’s on the menu? Me-n-u.

5. I’m sorry I wasn’t part of your past, can I make it up by being in your future?

6. Are you a singularity? Not only are you attractive, but the closer I get to you, the faster time seems to slip by.

7. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put “U” and “I” together.

8. Excuse me, miss, can I have the time? I’d check my watch but I can’t take my eyes off you.

9. My love for you is like dividing by zero – it cannot be defined.

10. Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re CuTe

11. If I freeze, it’s not a computer virus. I’m just stunned by your beauty.woman wearing fairy costume while holding butterfly on her palms

RELATED: 99 Cute, Funny, And Cheesy Friendship Pick-Up Lines

12. Roses are red, violets are blue, love never crossed my mind until I came across you.

13. I’ll be Burger King and you be McDonald’s. I’ll have it my way, and you’ll be lovin’ it.

14. I’m no photographer, but I can picture us together.

15. Are you a keyboard? Because you’re my type!

16. I need more than 140 characters to tell you how beautiful you are.

17. Baby, if you were a fruit you’d be a fineapple.

18. Hi, I’m writing a phone book, can I have your number?

19. Your name must be Coca-Cola because you’re so-da-licious.

20. You’re so beautiful that last night you made me forget my pickup line.

21. Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you.

22. Me without you is like a nerd without braces.

23. I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.

24. I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours?

25. Do you like my shirt? It’s made out of boyfriend material.

RELATED: Eyes Pickup Lines: 130 Examples That Work Like A Charm

Funny Jokes To Make You LOL

man and woman looking at each other beside treesAnd finally, here are some plain good jokes and smooth pick-up lines that are a mix of all the things mentioned above. You can use these as funny Tinder conversation starters, share them on social media or simply use them in real life and make your crush or friends smile!

Either way, they’ll do the trick as they’re just too good to keep to yourself. Whoever you bless with these will thank you later.

1. What do you and your shower have in common? You both get wet when I turn you on.

2. Are you made of beryllium, gold, and titanium? You must be because you are BeAuTi-ful.

3. Well, here I am! What are your other two wishes?

4. For my next trick, I need a condom and a volunteer…

5. Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control because I just saw a fox!

6. Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is pretty messed up!

7. Screw me if I am wrong, but haven’t we met before?

8. They call me the cat whisperer, ‘cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

9. I’m no weatherman but I know you’re going to get 3 inches tonight.

10. Excuse me? Do you work at Little Caesars? Cuz Ur Hot And I’m Ready.

woman and man laughing surrounded with floral trees11. Did you get those yoga pants on sale? Because at my house they’re 100% off.

12. I’ll be Burger King and you be McDonald’s. I’ll have it my way, and you’ll be lovin’ it.

13. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I pass by you again?

14. You must be peanut butter because you’re making my legs feel like jelly.

15. Are you a keyboard? Because you’re my type!

16. I’m sorry I wasn’t part of your past, can I make it up by being in your future?

17. Why did the coach go back to the bank? To get his quarterback!

18. Every function without you will always be void of love.

19. Approach a woman in a bar and whisper “Hey, wanna get out of here?” If she says yes, you can sit where she was.

20. My name is John but you can call me tonight.

21. Did you fall from heaven? No, I crawled out from Hell. No wonder you’re really hot!

See also: 175 Hilarious But Sweet Pick-Up Lines For Guys And Girls

Funny Jokes To Make You LOL

woman in black jacket standing near field of rosesAnd finally, here are some plain good jokes and smooth pick-up lines that are a mix of all the things mentioned above. You can use these as funny Tinder conversation starters, share them on social media or simply use them in real life and make your crush or friends smile!

Either way, they’ll do the trick as they’re just too good to keep to yourself. Whoever you bless with these will thank you later.

1. What do you and your shower have in common? You both get wet when I turn you on.

2. Are you made of beryllium, gold, and titanium? You must be because you are BeAuTi-ful.

3. Well, here I am! What are your other two wishes?

4. For my next trick, I need a condom and a volunteer…

5. Can I borrow your cell phone? I need to call animal control because I just saw a fox!

6. Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is pretty messed up!

7. Screw me if I am wrong, but haven’t we met before?

8. They call me the cat whisperer, ‘cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

9. I’m no weatherman but I know you’re going to get 3 inches tonight.

10. Excuse me? Do you work at Little Caesars? Cuz Ur Hot And I’m Ready.man in white dress shirt holding phone while looking at laptop11. Did you get those yoga pants on sale? Because at my house they’re 100% off.

12. I’ll be Burger King and you be McDonald’s. I’ll have it my way, and you’ll be lovin’ it.

13. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I pass by you again?

14. You must be peanut butter because you’re making my legs feel like jelly.

15. Are you a keyboard? Because you’re my type!

16. I’m sorry I wasn’t part of your past, can I make it up by being in your future?

17. Why did the coach go back to the bank? To get his quarterback!

18. Every function without you will always be void of love.

19. Approach a woman in a bar and whisper “Hey, wanna get out of here?” If she says yes, you can sit where she was.

20. My name is John but you can call me tonight.

21. Did you fall from heaven? No, I crawled out from Hell. No wonder you’re really hot!

See also: 110 Powerful Space Pick-Up Lines Guaranteed To Impress Anyone

Flirty Knock Knock Jokes

woman in white top laughing next to manAs I already said, a funny knock-knock joke can win me over every time. Use one of these flirty knock-knock jokes from the list below and I’m sure you’ll knock your crush off their feet.

1. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Kiss.

Kiss who?

ME!

2. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Aldo.

Aldo who?

Aldo anywhere with you.

3. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?

Pauline!

Pauline Who?

I think I’m Pauline in love with you.silhouette of woman and man close to each other4. Knock, Knock.

Who’s there?

Needle!

Needle who?

Needle a little love right now.

5. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Ben.

Ben who?

Ben over and kiss me!

6. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Cheese.

Cheese who?

Cheese a cute girl!

7. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?

Honeydew!

Honeydew who?

Honeydew you know how fine you look right now?

8. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Cynthia.

Cynthia who?

Cynthia you have been away, I missed you.

9. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?

Egg!

Egg who?

Eggcited to meet you.

10. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Evvie.

Evvie who?

Evvie thing that I have is your darling.woman with sunglasses in her hair laughing on stairs11. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?

Candice!

Candice Who?

Candice be love I’m feeling right now?

12. Who’s there?

Mayer.

Mayer who?

Mayer days be filled with laughter and love.

13. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?

Al!

Al who?

Al give you a kiss if you open this door!

14. Who’s there?

Olive.

Olive Who?

Olive you and I always have!

15. Knock knock!

Who’s there?

Butch.

Butch who?

Butch your arms around me!

16. Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Oman.

Oman who?

Oman, you are cute!

17. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?

Mistletoe.

Mistletoe who?

How can I kiss you I’m outside!

18. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?

Value.

Value who?

Value be my Valentine?

Dirty Jokes And Pick-up Lines

man and woman lying on bed while eating pizzaIf you want to heat things up a bit, here’s the right list for you. Below you’ll find some dirty, cheesy pick-up lines, but you really need to be careful with these.

Don’t use these dirty pick-up lines in the beginning phase of your relationship/texting because they might actually drive your crush away.

1. What’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I don’t have a Ferrari.

2. Is your name winter? Because you’ll be coming soon.

3. What did you say your name was? I want to make sure I’m screaming the right name tonight.

4. One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?

5. Are you an elevator? Because I’ll go up and down on you.

6. I can tell you’re into yoga, why don’t you spend a little time showing me just how flexible you are?

7. Roses are red. Violets are fine. You be the 6. I’ll be the 9.

8. Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of me move without even touching it.

9. I was feeling very off today, but then you turned me on.

10. With school, I just want an A. With you, I just want to F.

11. What’s the entry fee for your grand leg opening event?

12. Are you a sea lion? Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight.

13. You know, if I were you, I’d have sex with me.

14. Is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I swear I can see myself in your pants.

15. Hi, I’m wasted but this condom in my pocket doesn’t have to be.

RELATED: Top 200 Dirty Never Have I Ever Questions

To Wrap Up

woman sitting on a cliff during sunsetSometimes we feel so nervous when we’re talking/texting with our crush. We’re afraid that we might say something stupid or that the conversation may become extremely dull.

Here’s something that will help you to refresh those dull conversations and to ignite the fun ones. Arm yourself with these incredibly funny and flirty jokes and sweep your crush off their feet every time.

Also, a good sense of humor is one of the hottest qualities a person can have. It’s also proven that humor can increase attraction and greatly improves a relationship. So, use these flirty jokes on your bae and I’m sure you’ll be laughing all the way to the bedroom.

120+ Flirty Jokes, Funny Pick-Up Lines And Witty One-Liners

50+ Funny text messages to make her laugh and make her attracted to you

What is the secret to falling in love? Well, nobody knows. However, there are ways of making your crush fall for you. Funny text messages to make her laugh is one way to go. These messages are not only witty and hilarious but also convey a hidden love message. Here are 50+ of these messages to help you catch the attention of your love interest.

Funny text messages to make her laugh

Photo: pexels.com, @keira-burton (modified by author)
Source: UGC

In this age and era, text messages are one of the most used means of communication. Phones have become part of us, and utilizing them for communication and entertainment is ideal. So, use your phone today and smitten your love interest with these love paragraphs for her messages below.

If you are stuck and don’t know how to make a girl laugh over text, worry not. Below is a compilation of some of the hilarious text messages you can use on your love interest.

  • I’m not a professional photographer, but I can picture us together.
  • I think my phone is broken because, for some reason, your number isn’t on it.
  • If you are cute, you can call me baby. If you are nice, you can call me sweetie. But if you are hot, you can call me tonight!
  • I think you are one of the leading causes of global warming because you are smoking hot.
  • Your father must be a mobster because you are the bomb like dynamite.
  • I love all the stars in the sky, but they are nothing compared to the ones in your eyes!
  • Life is full of beautiful things: soft sunsets, painted rainbows, delicate blossoms, love & laughter, quiet moments & a wonderful someone like you.
  • As long as you are holding one hand, I can capture the world with the other one.
  • Your hug is the best place to be, your name is my favourite word, and your voice is my ideal sound!
  • I want to acquire you the way Facebook acquired Instagram. I love you!
  • I’m not a gambler, but I’ve just allowed my heart and my mind to bet that I will never stop loving you.
  • I’d love to see you only on days that end with y.
  • For the last 24 hours, 1440 minutes, 86400 seconds, I’ve missed you.
  • My life without you is like a beautiful vase waiting to be filled with a flower called you.
  • Hey beautiful, I don’t think you were meant to stay on earth because you’re an angel sent from heaven.
  • The doctor told me that I have a healthy heart, but for some reason, it skips a beat whenever I see you.
  • My mother tells me that when I was a little kid, I cried a lot. I realized today it was because I was missing you.
  • Hey, Let’s commit the perfect crime, I’ll steal your heart, and you steal mine.
  • Last night I hugged my pillow and dreamt of you… I wish that someday I’d dream about my pillow, and I’d be hugging you.
  • They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but when I look at yours, I’m speechless!

Funny text to send a girl

Funny text messages to make her laugh

Photo: pixabay.com, @georges_mjanja (modified by author)
Source: UGC

What can I text a girl to make her laugh? There are many things a man can say to a girl and make her smile. So, if you are stuck and have run out of ideas, try these text messages below. These messages are among things to say to a girl to make her feel special.

  • I’ve been getting wrinkles from smiling so much. Stop being too sweet! You’re driving me insane.
  • Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, aSentenceWithoutSpaces.
  • Never kiss a police officer, she will say, hands up. Never kiss a doctor, she will say, next, please. Always kiss a teacher, she will say, repeat it five times.
  • Love is like peeing your pants; everyone can see it, but only you can feel it. Thanks for being the pee in my pants.
  • You make things hard. I like that.
  • Do you know what my favourite thing in the world is? The second word of this text.
  • I know staring at people for too long is considered rude. So, I wanted to ask for your permission.
  • I love you. You’re my pudding. But how come you’re not in the bakery?
  • True love is like a pillow. You can hug it when you’re in trouble. You can cry on it when you’re in pain. You can embrace it when you’re happy, So when you need true love, Buy a pillow!
  • I don’t play chess, but you’re definitely my queen.

Funny things to say to a girl

What would make a girl laugh? When said correctly, the unexpected might be the most amusing. For some folks, a short funny statement is sufficient since they grasp the humour quickly. Others may require some time to think about it. In any case, when it eventually comes down, laughter is unavoidable.

  • Am I cute enough yet, or do you need more of these vodkas?
  • I sure hope, girl, that you know CPR because you make my heart skip a beat.
  • Girl, will you stop getting any hotter? You are killing the poor thermometer!
  • You must go and see a doctor, girl! Because you have ‘BEAUTY’ all over your face!
  • Girl, you are like dandruff because I cannot get you out of my head.
  • Why do men like to fall in love at first sight? Because doing so saves them a lot of money.
  • Can I borrow a kiss from you? I promise you that I will give it back.
  • Never laugh at your significant other’s choices because you happen to be one of them.
  • Are you familiar with that tingly feeling that you get in your body when you start to develop feelings for someone? That feeling is all of your common sense, leaving your body.
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pauline. Pauline, who? I think I’m Pauline in love with you.
  • You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body. In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
  • The brain is the most impressive organ in our whole body. From the day you are born, it works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, right up until you fall in love.
  • Love is when I walk to the other side of the classroom to sharpen my pen so that I can you. Only to realize that I am holding a pen.
  • Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.
  • Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten, I see!
  • I have a crush on your mind, I fell for your personality, and your looks are just a big bonus.
  • Wait a minute. Why did it take you so long to enter my life? I’m angry.
  • Your dad must have been a thief because he stole all the stars in the sky and put them in your eyes!
  • I have had an awful day, and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?
  • I may annoy you, and you might want to kill me… I permit you but on one condition. Don’t shoot me in the heart because that’s where you are!

Jokes to make a girl laugh

Funny text messages to make her laugh

Photo: pexels.com, @kampus (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Is it difficult to make her laugh? The trick is simple enough for anyone to learn. The key is to make your jokes appear natural and relatable. A far-fetched joke will appear phoney and hollow. But, if you can inject some reality into the joke, you’ll have a winner. Here are some beautiful examples to follow.

  • Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef? He’ll dessert you!
  • What does the ghost call his true love? My ghoul-friend.
  • What did the little boat say to the yacht? Can I interest you in a little row-mance?
  • What did the guy with the broken leg say to his nurse? «I’ve got a crutch on you.»
  • What do you call two birds in love? Tweet-hearts!

There are many funny text messages to make her laugh. The above collection of messages will make your girl smile. Laughter is the best medicine, and making your love interest laugh is one way to get closer to her heart. If you’re stuck for jokes to tell your crush, the ones listed above will come in handy.

Yen.com.gh recently published a fascinating article on the 100+  I love you quotes, sayings, and messages for her. Consider the best words, romantic phrases, and thoughtful quotes when writing I love you more messages for her. Do not be haphazard, as this will not benefit your girl. Instead, choose words that she might want to hear.

Nice words go a long way toward strengthening romantic bonds. But how do you put deep love into words? Discover more with these simple 100+ quotes for your loved one.

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Source: YEN.com.gh

Top 30 funny text messages you can send to your friends

Friends are the most priceless gifts that the universe can ever offer to us. It is essential to make our pals happy by sharing some good laughable moments that make our lives exciting and memorable. Make such beautiful moments by merely sending your friends funny texts messages that will surely make them laugh their problems away.

funny texts

30 funny texts to send. Photo: legit.ng
Source: UGC

We are living in the technological century, where making our besty happy can only take us seconds. You do not have to be creative to achieve this. Just follow the below lists of funny text messages that will surely turn a frown into a smile no matter the situation your pal is experiencing. These include funny text messages for a female friend, funny text jokes, and messages to cheer up a friend, funny, witty messages, among others.

Funny texts jokes

One primary reason that we have pals is to share some of the hilarious jokes that we come across our daily lives. By simply crafting jokes into text messages, you can laugh out loud (LOL) with your favourite human as you share happy moments through funny text jokes.

funniest text messages

Funny texts jokes. Photo: pixabay.com
Source: UGC
  • Hey pal, what name would you call a dog that has no both legs?…well it does not matter what name you might call him, trust me he is not coming!
  • Since you think you know too much than me, what breed of dog can jump higher than buildings? The answer is «any dog,» because buildings cannot jump.
  • Dear besty, if you get the answer to this, then lunch is on me. What is the tallest building in the entire world?… It must be the library because it has so many stories!

Funny text messages for your friend when they are sad

Even though we love and would like to protect our friends from any harm, the reality is that sadness and hard times tend to loom amid our friendships. This might include our friends facing breakups, rejections, and much more. Nothing works better to cheer them up like funny text messages.

funny texts to send

Funny text messages for your friends. Photo: pixabay.com
Source: UGC
  • Hey, beautiful. Stop crying because it is over. Start smiling because that ungrateful loser is someone else problem.
  • Don’t be sad that he chose her over you, stop counting your thunderstorms, and start counting your rainbows!
  • Hey pal, if they hurt you again, just tell me, I can make their death look like an accident! Don’t worry I have got your back.
  • Please remember, do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.
  • If you feel down, like the world is not listening, and you feel like crying, just remember, there is someone out there struggling to pull a push to open door.

Hilarious texts full of wit for your friend

This is for those buddies who not only share great times but also are sharp in mind. Instead of just sending any funny messages, why not put in some intelligence and witty fun to spice up the moment? Explore the below list for inspiration on how to come up with witty, hilarious texts.

hilarious texts

Hilarious texts full of wit for your friend. Photo: pixabay.com (modified by the author)
Source: UGC
  • Before we meet tonight for the party, just remember that life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you are drunk.
  • Dear besty, I hope you studied well for tomorrow’s exam. Today as I was reading, I noticed that the word «Studying» was made up of two words originally…» students dying!»
  • Hey pal, don’t let anyone look down upon you. People like that need a high-five in the face with a chair.
  • Next time you make fun of me, I will give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it is Santa’s hotline.
  • Hey friend, wanna hear a joke? «Two strands of DNA are walking down the street. One says to the other: «Do these genes make me look fat?»

Funny texts to send your best friend

The truth remains that many people would love to have special people in their lives that they could refer to as best friends. If you belong to that lucky group of individuals, then you can borrow the below funny texts to cheer your better half.

funniest texts

Funny texts to send your best friend. Photo: usplash.com
Source: UGC
  • Hey there, did you know that you are my BFFLWYLION… that means that you are my «Best Friend For Life Whether You Like It Or Not.»
  • Hey buddy, I think that you and I will definitely be friends forever. You know why? Because we are too lazy to find new pals.
  • It is incredible how we can coincidentally look at one another and without even having to say a word, know we are making fun of the same person.
  • Sometimes I wonder how you put up with me, then I remember, oh! I put up with you! So we are even.
  • Dear best buddy, life is too short to be serious all the time. So… if you cannot laugh at yourself, call me…I will laugh at you.
  • We have been friends for so long that I cannot imagine which one of us is the bad influence.

Funniest text messages to send your friend during birthdays

Best friends are more like brothers and sisters from different mothers. Celebrating their birthdays is one of the most important days of our lives as we clearly express our love to them. There is no simpler way to achieve that than coming up with the funniest texts that will surely make them laugh and tickle their funny bones.

funny text messages

Funniest text messages to send your friend. Photo: pixabay.com (modified by the author)
Source: UGC
  • Happy Birthday to my one and only true best pal. What would I do without you? Without our conversations, I bet my therapy bills would be outrageous.
  • Happy Birthday to my best friend ever! May your troubles be few and far between as my grandmother’s teeth!
  • Happy Birthday to one of the very few people of whom I can remember their birthdays without depending on a Facebook reminder.
  • For your Birthday, I wanted to give you something that was both funny and charming, but then I remembered you already have me in your life. HBDAY!
  • «Forget about the past; you can change it. Forget about the future; you can predict it. Forget about the Present; I did not get you one! Happy born day, my besty!»

Funny things to text a girl

Most boys tend to find it hard to make their female girlfriends smile. Others go to the extents of buying them expensive prices. Let me steal you a secret. By finding Funny text messages to send your female friend, you can make the bond between you grow stronger as not all girls are attracted to money.

funny things to text a girl

Funny things to text a girl. Photo: pixabay.com
Source: UGC
  • A friend like you is like a good bra… «Hard to find, Supportive, Comfortable, Always lifts you up, Makes you look better… and always close to your heart!»
  • I think you are an interior decorator. Do you know why? Because when you walked in class that day, the room was suddenly beautiful and perfect!
  • Have you ever traveled to another planet apart from planet earth? (Her reply: NO!) Wow! We have so much in common!
  • Hey besty, I think you need to see the doctor (Her: Why?) Because you have beauty all over your face!
  • Excuse me, dear, today when I met you, I believed that you must have been lost. (Her: Why?) Because heaven is up there, not down here!
  • Tell me, did it hurt? (Her: what?) When you fell from heaven and broke your wings! Because to me, you are as beautiful as an angle.

From the above list of funny texts messages, I believe you have got some great ideas that will make you that friend who everyone loves to be close to due to the creative, funny texts messages that you send. You do not need money, you do not need a fancy present, or even die for your friend to show that you care for them, send them funny text messages and have a great time daily.

READ ALSO: Top text messages to make her fall in love with you in 2021

Legit.ng posted the best text messages that will make her fall in love with you. A text message is an underestimated tool that can excite a woman, make her feel butterflies in her stomach, dizziness in her head, and love in her heart. Do not underestimate the effects of creatively composed text messages Get the full list in the article.

Source: Legit.ng

When it comes to fantastic inventions of the modern era, it’s hard to go past the smartphone. These pieces of tech allow us to communicate with anyone at any time across the globe. While originally designed for communicating, smartphones are an all-in-one entertainment system these days. You can surf the web, listen to music, watch movies, sell shares, and even count your steps. But the best thing is the ability to send messages. Nobody actually talks on the phone these days, especially the younger generations. It’s all text messages with gifs and emojis often replacing real words. While texting has made it easier to chat with friends and family, it can often lead to some hilarious exchanges and funny text messages.

We’ve scoured the internet to find some of the funniest text messages ever screenshotted. Some are grammatical errors while others are witty replies. What they all have in common is how funny they are. So read on and prepare to giggle at these funny text messages. 

1. Don’t Make the Same Mistakes Twice

Here is an awkward conversation between father and son that will give you a good laugh. 

2. Nuggets Anyone?

This funny text would surely annoy every parent. Good joke from Emily though. 

3. Are You Pregnant?

When your boyfriend mistakes the thermometer for a pregnancy test. 

4. Game of Thrones Is Not Ok

Just when you think the sister is going to get mad due to the graphic nature of Game of Thrones, it turns out she’s more worried about her child missing the earlier seasons. This one will give you a good laugh. 

5. Accidently Banging Your Friends Wife

If this text got delivered it would be an all-timer. While it reads like the sender banged his friend’s wife in the driveway, it was actually her car he hit. This is the type of friendly text message you need to proofread before sending. 

6. Stop Playing Chess With My Dad

When you lose the Queen it doesn’t mean you have to give up the King. True love might not exist but at least this lad can still play chess with his ex’s dad.

7. Don’t Play With Mom

When your mom tells you not to say a bad word but you go and do it anyway and this is her response. Don’t get mom mad! 

8. Mind If I Get a Wing?

Food delivery drivers are meant to bring you your food, not eat it. 

9. Don’t Let the Moth Get You

This dad is freaking out his daughter with a funny text. To be fair, I don’t think I’d be too keen home alone with a moth. 

10. Keep the Noise Down

Ever heard your sibling or friend having sex? This family knows exactly how you feel. 

11. Mum Has a Smartphone

Mom has finally joined the digital world but needs a little help when it comes to typing spaces. 

12. The Rock and His Twin

Nicky convinced her friend Becky the Rock and Dwyane Johnson are twins. This is a hilarious conversation that is sure to provide a few laughs. 

13. Poor Dad

Here’s a good joke at the expense of dad. 

14. Driving Instructor Dave

Poor old Dave doesn’t like being called a dickhead. Fair play though. He’s just trying to give lessons. 

15. At Least He’s Honest

Dads often don’t have any problem talking straight. Even when it’s something as serious as adoption, as is the case with this funny text message. 

16. When Cereal Is Life

The love of a good woman doesn’t compare to cereal. Funny text messages like this make for great memes to be shared on social media platforms. 

17. Facebook Market Place is Wild

Why this guy kept continuing the conversation is anyone’s guess, but it makes for some funny text messages. 

18. Not Even God Gets a Free Pass

Nobody should be texting when in church, no matter the hour. 

19. Wrong Number

Don’t you hate it when you text the wrong number? This person certainly did when they received the above message. 

20. Send Me a Dirty Picture

This wasn’t what the boyfriend had in mind when he asked for a dirty picture. 

21. Make Sure You Text the Right Person

Imagine being this dude? This is information he did not want his partner to know. 

22. Not My Drug Dealer

Nobody will know who this is…

23. Mom Likes the Deep Penis

When autocorrect stuffs things up. You know this text message quickly went viral on social media. 

24. Street Name

When you mix your street name up with your actual street name. 

25. When Dad Is a Savage

I wouldn’t want this fella as my dad. What a savage. 

26. Too Drunk

This person got so drunk they were talking to a potato. 

27. Please Send Nudes

This is a great response to a request for a nude. Even the lad on the receiving end would have to chuckle at getting this text back.

28. Not All Heroes Wear Capes

I’ve never heard somebody describe delivering pizzas in this way. 

29. That’s My Boy

Everyone deserves a dad as supportive as this guy. 

30. A Polite Stoner

Who knew stoners could be this easy-going and thoughtful? 

Jared studied at Medill School of Journalism before starting his writing career. As a staff writer at Next Luxury, he is passionate about helping men live life to the fullest.

Jared studied at Medill School of Journalism before starting his writing career. As a staff writer at Next Luxury, he is passionate about helping men live life to the fullest.

This is not the first post we did about funny texts being sent on instant messages apps, you can look at this big collection of fail texts, or even this hilarious texts from dog post we did a while back. So you already know we have a soft spot when it comes to funny texts being sent by mistake, or that damn auto-correct that messes up your text every time. It’s priceless! Take parents for example, it’s easy to say that most texts mistakes or funny messages come from parents, the reason is simple, most 40-50 years old were not born or raised in a world where smart phones is a basic thing as food, so they don’t have that skill in them like a 15-year-old who has an iPhone glued to their hand. Lack of technology skills = funny results for us.

Take a look at these 46 funniest texts collection and tell us in the comments which one is your favorite. Don’t forget to share as well.

Funny Texts #1 Mom texts are always the funniest

funny texts (1)

2: I think this mom knew what she was writing

funny texts 7 (1)

3: Drunk dad texts? Maybe, maybe not, but lightly fried fish is awesome

hilarious texts 6 (1)

4: Crazy mom

hilarious texts 2 (1)

5: Mom learning the meaning of WTF

hilarious texts 3 (1)

6: Mom really? Watch your mouth

hilarious texts 4 (1)

7: LMAO! This is my favorite i think

hilarious texts 5 (1)

8: Bored parents know how to pass the time

hilarious texts 22 (1)

9: Julian you dog! Wanna share more funny texts with us?

hilarious texts 37

10: Liar liar pants on fire, cheating GF

hilarious texts 38

11: Mom is cold, but it’s an effective way to find out

hilarious texts 44

12: Son trying to explain to mom what happened, faild miserably

funny texts 43

13: Strike three, and you’re out!

funny texts 46

14: Dad being the best dad he can

funny texts 42

15: Mom stahppp, you’re killing me

funny texts 41

16: Yayyyy we’re all gay….wait….what?

funny texts 48

17: funny nerd texts are always fun

funny texts 39

18: Building a fort is the best thing you can do together!

funny texts 45

19: Again, mom texts are the funniest texts ever!

funny texts 8 (1)

20: Get with the program mom, OMFG

funny texts 9 (1)

21: Gross dad, too much information much

funny texts 17 (1)

22: Because i’m reading them right now and texting back..

lol texts 11 (1)

23: Definitely, maybe, don’t bring DOUG

lol texts 10 (1)

24: Dad please, you sat on your phone again right?

lol texts 12 (1)

25: Just roll with it, it’s quicker, parents and texts it’s a mystery

lol texts 13 (1)

26: Mom really needs to learn how to texts

lol texts 14 (1)

26: Hilarious mistake text from mom

lol texts 15 (1)

26: Parents shouldn’t text

lol texts 16 (1)

29: It’s all in good fun, mom doesn’t think you’re shit

lol texts 18 (1)

30: You never listen Brian, never!

lol texts 20 (1)

31: Trying to trick mom into saying something stupid

lol texts 19 (1)

32: Mom doesn’t completely understand how texting work

funny texts 21 (1)

33: Forgetting your kid in the Walmart. Classic!

funny texts 32 (1)

34: Great dad, good to know you have a brain

funny texts 23 (1)

35: Wrong number messages are also cool

funniest texts 49

36: Never talk to text, just use your hands mom

funniest texts 25 (1)

37: Googling yourself is never a good idea man

funniest texts 26 (1)

38: Mom lost her ability to speak when she started texting

funniest texts 27 (1)

39: And somehow they manages to communicate

funniest texts 28 (1)

40: Moms never texts, never ever texts

funniest texts 29 (1)

41: No dancing, no fist bump, just go home mom

funniest texts 31 (1)

42: 7? Is nana so far ahead in the texting game we can’t get it?

funniest texts 30 (1)

43: Not sure far off

funniest texts 36 (1)

44: Are you really? Are you still together?

funny texts 34 (1)

45: That’s not something a mom wants to hear

funny texts 33 (1)

46: Coming out via text, funny as hell

funny texts 35 (1)

Don’t forget to share these hilarious texts with your friends


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Examples of funny, clever, and corny jokes you can text to your friends


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Want to make your friends laugh out loud with a text? Texting is a quick and easy way to connect with people, perfect for sending clever quips to brighten their day. All you need to do is find a few jokes that translate well on a phone screen! If you need a little inspiration, look no further. We’ve put together a handy list of jokes, puns, and witty one-liners you can send over text.

  1. Image titled 13460465 1

    1

    What do sea monsters eat? Fish and ships!

  2. 2

    What do a tick and the Eiffel tower have in common? They’re both Paris sites.[1]

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  3. 3

    What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.

  4. 4

    When does a joke become a dad joke? When it’s apparent.

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    5

    What did summer say to spring? I’m going to fall!

  6. 6

    What did one snowman say to another? Wait, do you smell carrots?

  7. 7

    What did the hungry clock do? It went back 4 seconds.

  8. 8

    What’s the tallest building in the world? A library, of course. It has so many stories!

  9. 9

    Don’t take life too seriously. Remember, you will never get out of it alive!

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    10

    I always take life with a grain of salt. And a slice of lemon. And a shot of tequila!

  11. 11

    I know they say that money talks… …But all mine says is “Goodbye!”

  12. 12

    I used to have a handle on life… …But then it broke.

  13. 13

    I tried to catch fog the other day. But I mist.

  14. 14

    Let’s start telling people their brain is an app. Maybe then they’ll want to use it!

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    15

    I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s literally impossible to put down!

  16. 16

    What do you call a one-eyed dinosaur? Thesaurus.

  17. 17

    Why can’t you trust a burrito? They tend to spill the beans.

  18. 18

    What’s a plant’s favorite drink? Root beer!

  19. 19

    I threw a boomerang a few years ago… …And now I live in constant fear.

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    20

    What did one hat say to another? You wait here; I’ll go on ahead.

  21. 21

    I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!

  22. 22

    Blunt pencils are really pointless.

  23. 23

    6:30 is the best time on a clock, hands down.

  24. 24

    Just burned 2,000 calories! That’s the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.[2]

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    25

    You and I will be friends forever! Because at this point, you know too much.

  26. 26

    Thanks for being my best friend. And for always going along with my worst ideas, of course!

  27. 27

    This may be cheesy… …But you’re legen-dairy!

  28. 28

    What concert only costs 45 cents? 50 Cent and Nickelback.

  29. 29

    There are 3 kinds of people in this world. Those who can count and those who can’t.

  30. Image titled 13460465 30

    30

    What kind of button doesn’t button or unbutton? A belly button!

  31. 31

    I know someone who does a great impression of an owl…

  32. 32

    I’m a nobody and nobody is perfect… …Therefore, I must be perfect!

  33. 33

    Knock knock. Who’s there? Muffin. Muffin who? Muffin in this world can stop us!

  34. 34

    Knock knock. Who’s there? Ben. Ben who? Ben thinking about you all day!

  35. Image titled 13460465 35

    35

    Knock knock. Who’s there? Spell. Spell who? Okay, fine…W-H-O.

  36. 36

    Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for.

  37. 37

    Are you a keyboard? Because you’re my type!

  38. 38

    On a scale of 1 to 10, you’re a 9… …And I’m the 1 you need!

  39. 39

    Roses are red, the world is a mess… …And worst of all, you’re not answering my texts.

  40. Image titled 13460465 40

    40

    Do you know what my favorite thing in the world is? The second word of this text!

  41. 41

    We’ll we’ll we’ll… If it isn’t autocorrect.

  42. 42

    Autocorrect has become my worst enema.

  43. 43

    What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

  44. 44

    The rotation of the Earth really makes my day.

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    45

    The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It got a little tense.

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Did you know the English language is the most complicated language to learn as a second language (Japanese is a close second)? Not so surprising when you think about words like, they’re, there and their. And not to mention the confusing plural nouns, like goose is geese, but moose as a plural is moose. To celebrate the beauty, the sophistication and the history of the English language there is even a holiday on April 23rd each year named English Language day (which is also William Shakespeare day – The famous English writer). While there are millions of brilliant words in the English Language, today we look at over 100 of the funniest words in the English language. I hope you love them, as much as I do!

Funny Words starting with A:

  1. Abibliophobia: The fear of running out of reading materials to read.

Sentence: I have so many reading materials in my house, anyone would think that I have Abibliophobia or something!

  1. Abozzo: A rough sketch of a drawing or a draft poem.

Sentence: I’m almost finished with my abozzo of the Eiffel tower.

  1. Ama: Japanese diver who dives for pearls or food.
  2.  

Sentence: Amas have been diving for pearls in the Japan region for many years. 

  1. Araba: A carriage or coach used in Turkey.

Sentence: I’m taking the araba through the city today.

  1. Argle-bargle:  A lot of commotion or a row happening.

Sentence: What’s all this argie-bargie about?

  1. Aye-aye: A type of lemur which can be found in Madagascar. 

Sentence: The aye-ayes are such cute little creatures.

Starting with B:

  1. Bamboozled: To trick or confuse someone. 

Sentence: I have been bamboozled again by you. 

  1. Blubber: This word has two meanings: It can mean to cry very loudly or could refer to excess body fat.

Blubber Sentence: Please, stop your blubbering.

  1. Brouhaha: An event which involves great excitement or loud confusion.

Brouhaha in a sentence: Last night’s event was such a brouhaha and nothing was achieved.

  1. Bumbershoot: A Bumbershoot is an old-fashioned word for an umbrella.

Bumbershoot in a sentence: Don’t forget your Bumbershoot, dear.

  1. Bumfuzzle: This refers to being confused.

Bumfuzzle in a Sentence: I’m completely bumfuzzled!

Starting with C:

  1. Cantankerous: Someone who is very grumpy.

Sentence: Our neighbour is such a Cantankerous.

  1. Catawampus: Something positioned diagonally. 

Sentence: To get to the school, you need to walk catawampus across that park over there.

  1. Collywobbles (kol-ee-wob-uh lz): This is the feeling when you have a stomach ache or when you feel really nervous or scared.

Collywobbles in a sentence: This place gives me the collywobbles, let’s go!

Hilarious Words Starting with D:

  1. Dingy: Something that is dark and dull.

Sentence: This house looks a little dingy to me. 

  1. Donnybrook: This refers to a fight, riot or a big brawl.

Donnybrook in a sentence: A Donnybrook broke out last night when the police when to arrest the leader of the operation.

  1. Doozy: Something that is really great.

Sentence: I’m having a doozy of a time at this party.

  1. Dweeb: This is not a nice word to call someone. It means that you think the person is boring and uninteresting.

Sentence: No-one wants to be a dweeb. 

Funny Words That Start With E: 

  1. Egad: Used as an expression of shock or amazement.

Sentence: Egad! I never thought of that! 

  1. Eep: Another expression of surprise or fear.

Sentence: Eep! That was scary!

  1. Epos: Could refer to an epic poem or something that is epic.  

Sentence: That poem was just epos!

Starting with F:

  1. Filibuster: Somone who refusing to give up the floor in a debate to prevent a vote.

Sentence: Someone get that silly filibuster out of here now!

  1. Flibbertigibbet (flib·ber·ti·gib·bet): Is a word used to describe someone who talks a lot or is very gossipy.

Flibbertigibbet in a sentence: Imagine sitting on a 12-hour flight with a flibbertigibbet next to you.

  1. Flabbergasted: To be surprised or shocked by something.

Sentence: I’m just flabbergasted to hear that.

  1. Formication: The feeling that ants are crawling on your skin.

Sentence: Her constant shivering could be described as a formication.

  1. Fuddy-duddy: Someone who is a mild-mannered person.

Sentence: He can be such a fuddy-duddy sometimes.

Starting with G:

  1. Gaberlunzie: A beggar that walks around town to town.

Sentence: He didn’t really have a profession, some may even call him a gaberlunzie.

  1. Gardyloo (gahr-dee-loo): This is a disgusting one. It refers to the cry people use to shout when they would throw their slops or droppings out of the window.

Gardyloo in a Sentence: Watch out, Gardyloo coming!

  1. Gazump: This word really has a specific meaning. It means to refuse to sell your house to someone who you previously agreed to sell your house to.

Sentence: I’m so happy my offer to buy the house next door was accepted, but what if I get gazumped?

  1. Gobbledygook: Speaking Nonsense.

Sentence: Why do you always have to speak such Gobbledygook?

  1. Goombah: An older friend who protects you.

Sentence: Jamie didn’t have many friends, but was glad that his grandpa could be his protector – His Goombah.

  1. Gubbins: These are objects of very little value like rubbish or litter.

Gubbins in a sentence: No one’s going to buy your gubbins.

Starting with H:

  1. Hairball: A ball of hair that a cat normally chokes out.

Sentence: Cats are cute, but I hate it when they throw-up hairballs everywhere.

  1. Hocus-pocus: A trick or magical spell.

Sentence: What’s all this hocus-pocus about?

  1. Hokey: Something is is silly or old-fashioned.

Sentence: Now that was hokey old movie to watch!

  1. Hootenanny: A country music party or get-together.

Sentence: I’m going to an old-fashioned Hootenanny on Saturday, would you like to come?

  1. Heckler: Someone who interrupts a public performance with offensive comments.

Sentence: Those footballers are always having to deal with hecklers at their matches. 

Starting with I:

  1. Itty-Bitty: Something that is really small or tiny.

Sentence: That ladybird is so itty-bitty.

  1.  Ickle: Something that is small and normally cute

Sentence: Look at that ickle baby dolphin!

  1. izzat:  This relates to your personal respect and dignity.

Sentence: I’m afraid of saying that in public, as it’ll be against my izzat. 

Starting with J:

  1. Jabberwock: Something that is complete nonsense or gibberish

Sentence: Everything he just said was complete Jabberwock.

  1. Jazzetry: The reading of poetry which is accompanied by jazz. 

Sentence: I love reading poems, but I’ve never tried jazzetry.

  1. Jink: The sudden change in direction.

Sentence: He jinked out of the way, as the ball came towards him.

Fun Words Starting with K:

  1. Kagu: An blueish-greyish type of bird which is now an endangered species. 

Sentence: The rare Kagu can be found in the Pacific island of New Caledonia.

  1. Kaka: A breed of parrot that can be found in New-Zealand.

Sentence: The kaka parrots are so cool!

  1. Kebbie: A Scottish term relating to a walking stick with a hooked end.

Sentence: Pass the old man his keebie.

  1. Kibble: Ground meal or gains used as animal feed. 

Sentence: The chickens love this new brand of kibble.

  1. Kraken: A mythical sea creature.

Sentence: Just like the loch ness monster, the Kraken is a myth. 

Starting with L:

  1. La-di-da: If you described someone as “La-di-da”, you are suggesting that they are upper-class or behaving unnaturally only to impress other people.

La-di-da in a sentence: She thinks she is all La-di-da, but I know what she’s really like.

  1. Lol: Short for laughing out loud. Mosting used on social media and in text messages. 

Sentence: Lol – That’s so funny!

  1. Lollygagger: Someone who walks around with no aim or goal.

Sentence: They spent their summer lying about, eating and general lollygagging.

  1. Lickety-split: When something moves really fast.

Sentence: He was out of the door lickety-split.

Starting with M:

  1. Malarkey: An informal word for talking about meaningless things or nonsense.

Malarkey in a sentence: This is all malarkey, I tell ya!

  1. Moist: Something that is slightly wet.

Sentence: This blanket seems a little moist to sit on. 

  1. Mollycoddle: To be extra nice to someone or to overprotect them.

Sentence: Sometimes what a child needs is some tough love and not mollycoddling all the time.

Starting with N:

  1. Nacket: A light lunch or snack.

Sentence: I’m going to have a quick nacket before dinner. 

  1. Namby-pamby: Someone who is weak, with no backbone.

Sentence: I don’t want to be some namby-pamby little girl!

  1. Napoo: The end of something. A term mostly used by soldiers.

Sentence: Napooh! That’s the end of that story.

  1. Niff: Something that smells bad.

Sentence: It’s got that horrible fishy niff. 

  1. Nincompoop: This refers to someone who is not intelligent or a fool.

Nincompoop sentence: You act like such a nincompoop sometimes.

Starting with O:

  1. Obi: A sash worn around the waist of a kimono.

Sentence: That pink obi would look nice with this kimono. 

  1. Oozy: Something that is slimy and wet

Sentence: That table is dripping in ooze. 

  1. Oompah: The sound of deep brass instruments in a band.

Sentence: The oompah music in the background really set the tone.

Starting with P:

  1. Panjandrum: Someone who thinks that they are superior to others.

Sentence: She’s no queen, but she saw acts like a panjandrum.

  1. Patroon: The captain of a ship

Sentence: Look sharp, the patroon will be here soon.

  1. Pettifogger: A pettifogger is someone who deals with small or petty businesses. It can also be to argue over small, unimportant matters.

Pettifogger in a sentence: Why do you look up to such a pettifogger?

Starting with Q:

  1. Quab: Something that is incomplete or immature

Sentence: That baby bird is still just a quab.

  1. Quark: Scientific term used to describe atoms which are made up of smaller particles. 

Sentence: Understanding quarks of fundamental to the world of physics.

  1. Quoz: Something that is strange.

Sentence: That’s so quoz! No-one wants to eat cheese and ice-cream together!

Silly Words Starting with R:

  1. Ratoon: This refers to the small root that sprouts from a plant, especially during the springtime.

Sentence: I heard somewhere that ratooned plants grow taller and healthier.

  1. Rugrat: Refers to a young child or toddler

Sentences: Those rugrats don’t know what’s coming to them!

  1. Ruddy: The term sometimes can be used to suggest good health in a person.

Sentence: That ruddy-faced girl was someone I never seen before. 

Starting with S:

  1. Sialoquent: Somone who splits while talking.

Sentence: My old science teacher was Sialoquent. I was always scared to go near him!

  1. Skedaddle: To ask some to leave or run away very quickly

Skedaddle in a sentence: This is no place to play your silly games, now skedaddle before I get you!

  1. Skullduggery Refers to dodgy dealings and some no good business.

Sentence: We need to put a stop to all this skullduggery around this town.

  1. Shenanigan: This is when someone is causing a lot of mischiefs or playing tricks.

Shenanigans in a sentence: What’re all the shenanigans about?

  1. Snollygoster (snol·ly·gos·ter): This refers to an unethical politician who is guided by personal advantage.

Snollygoster in a sentence: I don’t want any help from a snollygoster.

  1. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious: Something that is really good. And the longest word in the English dictionary.

Sentence: Your cake is simply supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

Starting with T:

  1. Tatterdemalion:  A poor child wearing rags.

Sentence: I grew up like a tatterdemalion on the streets and now I’m a billionaire!

  1. Taradiddle (tar-uh-did-l): this is a small lie or when someone is speaking nonsense.

Taradiddle in a sentence: That’s such taradiddle –  I don’t trust you at all!

  1. Thingamajig. A thing for which you have forgotten the name of. 

Sentence: Can you pass that thingamajig over?

  1. Troglodyte: Someone that lives in a cave.

Sentence: All my life I’ve been living like Troglodyte cooped up in this house!

Starting with U:

  1. Uber: Something that is really great.

Sentence: That’s a really uber-looking coat you got there!

  1. Ube: Type of yam which is coloured purple

Sentence: You can make really nice curry using ube.  

  1. Upsy-daisy: Lifting up a small child. 

Sentence: Upsy daisy! It’s time for your nap. 

  1. Urubu: A blank vulture found in South American.

Sentence: The Urubu is a rare species of bird found in America.

Starting with V:

  1. Vamp: To make something brand-new.

Sentence:  Let’s vamp-up your car. 

  1. Vexed: Something that is really annoying or frustrating. 

Sentence: This puzzle has really got me vexed. 

  1. veepstakes: A competition to find a party-s vice president. 

Sentence: Have you prepared for the upcoming veepstakes?

Starting with W: 

  1. Wabbit: A Scottish word referring to feeling exhausted or a little unwell.

Sentence: I’m feeling wabbit today.

  1. Widdershins (with -er-shinz): This refers to going in the opposite direction or going down the wrong path.

Widdershins in a sentence: Only widdershins going down that road.

Starting with X:

All words beginning with X are funny ones!

  1. Xanthoderm: A person with yellowish skin. 

Sentence:  This make-up makes my skin look a little Xanthoderm. 

  1. Xebec: A small sailing-ship with square sails.

Sentence: Let’s take a ride on my new Xebec. 

Starting with Y:

  1. Yabby: Refers to any Australian crayfishes used for food. 

Sentence: These yabbies are going to taste delicious. 

  1. Yachty: Relates to yachts.

Sentence: I have a yachty-looking T-shirt. 

  1. Yaff: A type of bark.

Sentence: The dog yaffed at the mailman.

  1. Yawny: When you yawn or when something is boring

Sentence: That movie was a little yawny. 

  1. Yahoo:  A rube, a country bumpkin.

Sentence: What’s that yahoo doing here!

  1. Yerk: Pull or push something with a sudden movement.

Sentence; She yerked at the rope, as they tried to pull the bucket up from the well.

  1. yips: When a golfer misses an easy putt due to nervousness. 

Sentence: Looks like he has the yips today. 

Funniest Words starting with Z:

  1. Zaftig: Having a full-rounded figure.

Sentence:  Her zaftig figure was admired by all. 

  1. Zappy: Something that is lively and energetic.

Sentence: She looks very zappy today. 

  1. Zazzy:  Something that is shiny and flashy

Sentence: Jenny brought herself a new zazzy handbag to match her shoes.

  1. Zeze: A string instrument from South Africa. 

Sentence: The sound of the zeze is unique in South Africa.

  1. Zizz: To take a short nap or sleep.

Sentence: James likes to take a 2-hour zizz every afternoon at 2 pm.

  1. Zoanthropy (zoh-an-thruh-pee): This is when someone believes that they are an animal.

Zoanthropy in a sentence:  I think she suffers from a mild case of Zoanthropy.

What do you think of our selection of the funniest words in the English language? Do you have any more to add on? Let us know in the comments below. In the meantime, why not take a look at our post, 12+ Words Beginning with X Used in Sentences.

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