There are a few four-letter words that leaders would like to use more at work. You can probably guess the words I’m thinking of because you’ve almost certainly wanted to use them yourself! (Or perhaps you have…or do!)
Although there is some research that advocates the benefits of cursing at work, I’m still old-school in my approach. My mother would frequently remind me that the language we use reflects our level of intelligence and maturity, so instead of using curse words, we should find better ways to express ourselves. I still roll that way.
So, you won’t be surprised that I’m not advocating leaders more frequently use the four-letter words that begin with F, S, and D. No, I’m suggesting leaders use the four-letter word that begins with L.
Love.
In my new book, Simple Truths of Leadership: 52 Ways to Be a Servant Leader and Build Trust, co-authored with Ken Blanchard, we share Simple Truth #20:
Love is the answer. What is the question?
Most people have probably heard the “love passage” from the Bible read at a wedding or other special occasions. According to 1 Corinthians 13:4-7:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
I don’t know a better representation of the qualities of a trusted servant leader than the virtues listed in this passage. But if you ask someone who works for a self-serving leader to describe their boss, you’ll hear the opposite of these characteristics. Self-serving leaders are seldom perceived as patient or kind. They tend to envy others with more influence, brag about their accomplishments, and so on.
I believe servant leadership is love in action. And if love is the answer, perhaps the question is, “What do servant leaders lead with?
Do you want to know if your people see you as a servant leader? Well, if you’re up for the challenge, consider doing this:
- List the personal traits from this passage and rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 5 (least to most) as to how much they describe you as a leader.
- If you’re courageous, ask your team members to do the same. Make it anonymous.
- Once you get the feedback, set up a meeting with your team, share what you’ve learned, and ask them how you could improve on the traits where you scored low.
- Then—this is key—make changes in your leadership style to show them you are serious about improving.
One of the great things about love is that you don’t always have to say the word to let people know how you feel. You can demonstrate it through your everyday actions and interactions with your people. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with saying the word, too.
Love. It’s the four-letter word leaders need to use more often at work.
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Employee engagement 4 letter words for work
4 letter words for workThe Employee Engagement Network
Produced by David Zinger and John Junson
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WORD
EE Network
EE Network members
were invited to contribute
their 4 letter words for work.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network2
WORD
EE Network
EE Network members
were invited to contribute
their 4 letter words for work.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network2
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PHUN
P — productive
H — happy
U — useful
N — neededNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerGeorge Mosley
The
Employee
Engagement
Network3
PHUN
P — productive
H — happy
U — useful
N — neededNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerGeorge Mosley
The
Employee
Engagement
Network3
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GOOD
Give
Opportunities &
Optimism
DailyNetwork
Knowledge
Partnerle cairn 4 it
The
Employee
Engagement
Network4
GOOD
Give
Opportunities &
Optimism
DailyNetwork
Knowledge
Partnerle cairn 4 it
The
Employee
Engagement
Network4
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CARE
C — Concern
A — Attention
R — Recreation
E — EnjoymentNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerIshwar K Karki
The
Employee
Engagement
Network5
CARE
C — Concern
A — Attention
R — Recreation
E — EnjoymentNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerIshwar K Karki
The
Employee
Engagement
Network5
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POTS
Passion
Opportunity
Talent
SuccessNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerDeepali Gokhale
The
Employee
Engagement
Network6
POTS
Passion
Opportunity
Talent
SuccessNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerDeepali Gokhale
The
Employee
Engagement
Network6
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GIVE
Network
Knowledge
PartnerPeter Hart
The
Employee
Engagement
Network7
GIVE
Network
Knowledge
PartnerPeter Hart
The
Employee
Engagement
Network7
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HOME
Thato Koma
My 4 letter word for work is HOME. I do my work with
my whole Heart because that’s where my career
Opportunities lie. The thought of growing within
my organization keeps me Motivated and ultimately
an Engaged employee. My work is my HOME.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network8
HOME
Thato Koma
My 4 letter word for work is HOME. I do my work with
my whole Heart because that’s where my career
Opportunities lie. The thought of growing within
my organization keeps me Motivated and ultimately
an Engaged employee. My work is my HOME.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network8
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TISH
Stephen Booth
People over the age of 40 living in the UK are probably
aware
of the word TISH (generally used in the phrase “Oh
tish!” after
something someone else has said to deflect praise or
indicate the ridiculousness of their statement).Timewasting Irrational Stupid Horror
Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network9
TISH
Stephen Booth
People over the age of 40 living in the UK are probably aware
of the word TISH (generally used in the phrase “Oh tish!” after
something someone else has said to deflect praise or
indicate the ridiculousness of their statement).Timewasting Irrational Stupid Horror
Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network9
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.
RAVE
R — Ramify
A — Agile
V — Vroom
E — EngageNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerYokaselvi
SubramaniamThe
Employee
Engagement
Network10
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.
PLAY
Bogdan
Wrzesinski“The master in the art of living makes little distinction between his work
and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his information and his recreation, his love and his religion. He hardly knows which
is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence at whatever he does,
leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him he’s always doing both.”
~James A. MichenerNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network11
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.
CARE
Network
Knowledge
PartnerVijay Kumar
ShrotryiaThe
Employee
Engagement
Network12
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.
TEAM
Network
Knowledge
PartnerNicola Murphy
The
Employee
Engagement
Network13
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.
LOVE
Katrina Gooch
I love the
work I do.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network14
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.
BOSS
Build
Others and
Serve
SocietyNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerRay Baumruk
The
Employee
Engagement
Network15
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.
BOND
Steven Brown
with your team, your mission.
Connectedness is critically important to
success at all levels of an enterprise.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network16
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.
TEAM
TEAM-Network
Knowledge
PartnerTogether
Every
Action
MattersNaomi CaiettiD
The
Employee
Engagement
Network17
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.
KARM
Akansha
(English meaning — Deed); because as our deeds decide our
destiny in the same way our work at workplace decides our
success.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network18
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.
LIFE
Michael Gillespie
I choose this word because if we did not have to work, what would
challenge us in life? Work is the fuel that is needed to help us achieve
our goals and desires in life. Everyone complains about having to
go to work, but what would challenge us intellectually if we did not
work? I require a certain amount of challenge in my career to keep me
motivated and focused to achieve my desired goals. The old saying of
“Work to live and live to work” is very truthful, some people just take
it too far. Everyone has to have a reason to wake up in the morning.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network19
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.
CARE
David Zinger
When we care and are cared for it makes all the difference and
we can care for results and relationships. Many people used
their word as an acronym so here goes:Connect Authentic Results Engaged.
Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network20
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.
LEAD
L — Leadership
E — Engagement
A — Add
D — DedicationNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerLinda Oien
The
Employee
Engagement
Network21
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.
TEAM
Network
Knowledge
PartnerVijay Kumar
ShrotryiaThe
Employee
Engagement
Network22
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.
LOVE
Bay
JordanAyn Rand defined work as “love made manifest” which, if you
think about it, is a more succinct way of saying what James A
Michener said in his quote that someone has cited earlier. For
me that says it all, because love is an essential ingredient of life
and so is work, so the two have to be linked or you are wasting
your life. Therefore my 4 letter word can only be love:
Living Only (for the) Values (I)ExpandNetwork
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network23
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.
LOVE
Carl Bonura
Yes, LOVE…Love who you are, Love those
around you, Love what you do. Love the
positive return. Love is an investment.
When you give Love, Love is returned
many fold. And as they say, Love
makes the world go ‘round.”Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network24
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.
THNK
Ganesh
RamakrishnanMy 4-letter word is THNK which is THINK without the I (ego). It
serves as a reminder to apply thought before taking an action,
to be thoughtful in interacting with others and to ensure that
one’s ego need is kept out of the equation in all this.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network25
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NEED
Network
Knowledge
PartnerMartin Stein
The
Employee
Engagement
Network26
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GROW
Betsy Kennally
G: Goals achieved working with great teams. R: Results attained
via strong collaboration, the heart of all great work. O: Ownership for our commitments and levels of engagement W: Wisdom
gained through experiences and when we learn something new.
Work is the best learning lab on the planet!Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network27
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.
HAZY
Robin
Wooddall KleinI feel work is often misunderstood, with people going through the
motions to do what they believe others expect of them. That’s
what makes “work” unengaging and feeling like a chore. When
people are able to understand the impact of their “work” on
others and find a way to tie it to a personal passion, the sky’s
clear and become bright blue with possibility.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network28
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FUNN
Dr. Scott
SimmermanIf it isn’t fun, can’t you find something else to do? I’ve moved
to a point where there is nothing I would rather be doing and,
at 65 and enrolled in Medicare, I really cannot even see myself
ever retiring. Heck, what would I do? One tries to leave a legacy
and one works toward that. I WOULD like to find someone interested in taking over the day to day stuff and allowing me to
buzz around more, but that is a whole ‘nother thread…Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network29
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.
ZEAL
Robert Morris
With all due respect to the importance of “love”
and to “happiness” (a nine-letter word, much
in vogue), my vote is for zeal. When it is absent
from whatever I am doing, I stop and do
something else.Network
Knowledge
PartnerThe
Employee
Engagement
Network30
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.
This book was written by over 25 members of the Employee Engagement Network.
John Junson designed the book. David Zinger hosted the forum and edited
the book. The network has over 6000 members. We are an
eclectic group of people with a wide range of interests in employee
engagement. Visit us at www.employeeengagement.ning.com.Knowledge Partner
click here to learn moreThis e-book publication is made
available with the generous support
of Juice Inc., training progressive
business leaders to attract, retain
and energize employees to create
an environement where people and
organizations flourish. The e-book
responses represent the opinions
of the individual contributors and do
not necessarily represent the views
of the Network or of our knowledge
partner, Juice Inc.
If you require additional information or
assistance contact the network founder:
David Zinger at david@davidzinger.comThe
Employee
Engagement
Network31
Many people enjoy a healthy and sometimes rewarding or even fulfilling relationship with work. For some others, though — especially for some problem personality types — work is more than literally a four-letter word, especially when it benefits someone else.
Recently, I wrote about attitudes toward work (see “Changing Attitudes Toward Work”). But there’s an important issue involving work sentiments that I did not address in the last article, namely the dysfunctional and socially problematic attitudes that some types of personalities have toward work. For most of us, work is not only a perceived necessity but also, many times, a life’s passion and a means to personal fulfillment. And for those of us fortunate enough to be involved in an enterprise that makes the best use of our talents and allows us to make a meaningful social contribution to boot, our work can be a most rewarding experience. But unfortunately, for some individuals work is truly a dirty little word.
There are several personality types notorious not only for their distaste for work, but also for the negative impact that their distaste for work has on society. I have written extensively on these personalities in both of my books, Character Disturbance, and In Sheep’s Clothing, as well as in prior posts on this blog (see “Understanding the Aggressive Personalities”, the series on Aggressive Personalities, and the series on Thinking Errors of Disturbed Characters). And two of the most problematic aggressive personality types I’ve written about — the unbridled aggressive (i.e., antisocial) personality and the predatory aggressive (i.e., psychopathic or sociopathic) personality — are in part defined by their seriously dysfunctional attitudes toward work.
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It’s not that the problem personalities among us won’t work at all. True, some are, for lack of better words, lazy and parasitic (e.g., some antisocial and sociopathic types), but even these folks can sometimes put out considerable sweat and effort. What they really resist is engaging in the kind of work that for most of us is begotten out of a sense of social obligation. They simply detest putting out effort that might, even in part, benefit someone else. They’re quite capable of spending inordinate amounts time and energy working purely to get something they want. A criminal type of personality, for example, might spend weeks ‘casing’ a particular place of business, taking careful notes, and concocting elaborate plans to rob it successfully. But putting the same amount of energy into finding or keeping a legitimate job, demonstrating the loyalty and consistency necessary to be considered for advancement, or making the investment in personal self-development to merit consideration for more advanced position are completely different matters, and most unattractive enterprises.
Problematic attitudes toward work are hallmarks of many disturbed characters, not just some of the aggressive personalities. Some problem characters (e.g., those with narcissistic traits) feel too entitled to anything they want to feel a sufficient sense of obligation to really earn things. Others (e.g., manipulative ‘con artist’ types) derive far more satisfaction from the idea of getting something for nothing or by swindling someone else than they can possibly get from putting in an honest day’s work. Still others have outright contempt for work, especially if the work’s primary purpose is something other than pure self-benefit (e.g., caring for one’s family, contributing to society, etc.).
Perhaps the toughest job any of us has in life is the work it takes to develop our own character. None of us is born perfect. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, some of which are naturally endowed. And we all have our share of hardships to overcome. So the greatest single challenge we face is reckoning with ourselves in such a way that we make of ourselves a productive, contributing, and respect-worthy person. Disturbed characters resist this kind of work more than any other. Why? Because even contemplating such an undertaking is too much like putting someone or something else ahead of one’s purely selfish desires. And for the character-impaired individual, nothing is as important to them as what they want. Besides, wanting something for nothing is, as mentioned before, another hallmark. So even when it comes to respect, they want to come by that in the same manner as everything else: without having to earn it.
Making the choice in one’s heart to be the best one can be for the welfare of all requires an uncommon level of dedication and commitment (see “Forge Sound Character With Hard Work”). And there’s absolutely no reason to submit to this arduous and life-long undertaking unless one has a deep and underlying sense of social obligation. But doing the work of character development can be another one of those labors of love. It certainly takes a lot of love to do it. It’s ironic that l-o-v-e is also a four-letter word. But it just doesn’t have the same connotation to people of integrity that w-o-r-k does for the impaired characters among us.
- character disturbance
- responsibility
- work-life
All clinical material on this site is peer reviewed by one or more clinical psychologists or other qualified mental health professionals. This specific article was originally published by Dr George Simon, PhD on May 22, 2012 and was last reviewed or updated by Dr Greg Mulhauser, Managing Editor on May 22, 2012.
https://counsellingresource.com/features/2012/05/22/work-four-letter-word/